What job ads really mean:
“Competitive Salary” - We remain competitive by
paying you less than our competition.
“Join our fast-paced company” - We have no time to
train you.
“Casual work atmosphere” - We don’t pay enough to
expect that you will dress up;
a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings.
“Some overtime required” - Some every night and some
every weekend.
“Duties will vary” - Anyone in the office can boss you
around.
“Must have an eye for detail” - We have no quality
assurance.
“Career-minded” - Female applicants must be childless
(and remain that way).
“Apply in person” - If you’re old, fat or ugly you’ll
be told that the position has been filled.
“Seeking candidates with a wide variety of experience”
- You’ll need it to replace the three people who just
quit.
“Problem-solving skills a must” - You’re walking into
perpetual chaos.
“Requires team leadership skills” - You’ll have the
responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or
respect.
“Good communication skills” - Management communicates,
you listen, figure out what they want and do it.