We have tonz of threads popping up about girls and boys being so desperate, so why are we so desperate?
Personally I think delaying the marriages has big part to play in this. Because we have raised the bar high (and moving it higher by time). Average marriage age is shifting towards high 20s and low 30s even in Desis.
Different reasons are given for this. Sometimes education, sometimes career, sometimes finding-oh-so-perfect-match and sometimes its simply “ghar baithee baree behen” or “ghar baitha bara bhai”.
What can be done to change this mentality and if you put your self in the scenario (as a parent of as eligible bride/grooms) how will u deal with this?
Re: he is desperate, she is desperate, we are desperate, they are desperate
also, people don't value commitment or aren't taught it. if you have multiple S/O's and are expected to date multiple people throughout the single life then it's really tough to settle down with one...so kudos to those who do! the concept of going through multiple people to find the right one is bizarre =\ I dont see why anyone would, if they can live life with no strings attached...so hence the whole concept of "desperate"
Re: he is desperate, she is desperate, we are desperate, they are desperate
well i don't know about getting married young.. wasnt there a thread by some kid about her fiance fighting with her on fb a week before their wedding, and talk of divorce? young people and marriage in a world with options = hell for a few months and divorce. its okay to be desperate for a bit if it means waiting till you grow up to find someone you don't want to fight with every day over dinner. it isn't all that hard to control desperation if you are familiar with a few basic tenets of civilized societies.
Re: he is desperate, she is desperate, we are desperate, they are desperate
Isn't it more desperate to marry the first or second guy whose family sends a proposal, regardless of how little u might have in common, how little ur attracted to him (if at all) or how much support u still need (financially and/or emotionally) as u can't yet stand on your own two feet??
Our parents and older generations married young but didn't lead the independent lives we do today, they had family constantly around and prob didn't have all the extra expenses and stress that married couples go thru today.. Also cos it was socially not acceptable to wait too long they often just had to 'settle' for people they might not have married had they had the choice.. Don't see how that's a good thing.. Not saying everything was bad cos obviously there were also plenty of plus points but I don't see the problem in ppl (inc me) waiting to tie the knot if that's what they want.. It's not necessarily better or worse to wait.. depends on the individual.. each to their own and at least nowadays a lot of us have more choice and say in the matter..
Re: he is desperate, she is desperate, we are desperate, they are desperate
Bahi it’s part of life, well actually young one’s (not me anymore :() are enjoying best of their.
So kids have fun as much as you can before you tied up. Don’t listen to the baba jee’s, life is too little to think about such. My blessings are with you, :k: