So with modernization and influence of the media, we are seeing that desi girls are slowly moving away from what is known in our culture as hayaa.
Few years ago, girls would be careful how they talked to guys, men, how they presented themselves outside their homes…and I’m not talking about extreme purdah or even hijaab, but simple modest appearance.
Now, if you say something, people jump all over you and give you this lecture that times have changed, women are out there, and it’s what we feel “inside” of us and “to each their own” and “mind your own business” kind of responses.
Yes, all well and good, but why this extreme jump?
waisy mard ye swal kerin tu khyr hai khwateen ki traf se atta hai na mujhey hyrat si hoti hy:D
Ab office main shared printer hai larki ne kuch print kiya woh lainy gai tu wahan teen char male colegues khary hain haiya dar larki sharam se lal gulal hu rahi hy khari. Woh k** dykh rahy hain magar wahin khery hain ky lutf andoz hu rahy hain. Dosri larki ai jhat se gai papers uthay aik nigah-eghalat bhi on per nahi dali chal di larkey ne jumla uchala os ne ignore nahi kiya(jaisa ke hamari ba hiya bibion ki riwayat hy) bas jwaban nehly per dehla mar diya. Yahan se besharam hu jati hy woh bas:D.**
There is a difference between personal choices and situations. And please note that I am not talking about any extreme conditions here, like not allowing women to go to work or school...not that type of stuff.
I believe that having sharam aur hayaa is such an important thing. Dress wise I think its a matter of self respect, if you respect yourself than others will too.
But to be frank, most of the girls today lack* this kind of soch. And its really a waste of time trying to explain to them because they just turn around and make you sound like the 'backward, loser type' person.
hayiya kin manon main istymal ker rahi hu nikki agar jismani taaluq ki baat hy tu yes I do care magar jahan tak aap koi masla discuss ker rahy hain or facts aisy hain ky khmkhwa ki shram ghyr zarori hy tu why that kind of shram haiya?
Quran ke pehly sipary main zina ke bary main hy. Agar aisi bat kerna sharam haiya ky usolon ke khilaf hy tu batao Allah ki kitab main jab hy ju ham choty choty bachon ko perhaty hain tu os per bat kerna kasiey mana hu giya:confused:
isi liy tu main apna point of view bata rahi hon:wink: bat bas yahn se hi shuru hoti hy ke haiya nahi rahi job kerny ya ziad aperhny wali larkion main:Dphir extreme tak chaly jaty hain hamary han log:D
** Oh ok great ghungat nikaley sharmai lajai khwateen ki kami hoti ja rahi hy;) Ghongat nikal ker 24 ghanty rakhna really bara mushkil hy patta nahi pehly zamany ki oratain kaisy rakhti thain her waqat:hmmm: Kabhi ghar main tajarba ker ky dykhu. ye laaamba sa ghngat karh ker chalo phiro andaza hu ga.
Ab keh do nahi kam as kam hijab tu pehan lain yar Hijab pehan ker agar kam by hijabion waley kerny tu os ka faida:hmmm:
I mean Mutaheda Arab Amarat ki misal samney hy. Shaikhon ko duniya bher ki twaifon ki khapat sab se ziada hai or jab baat ati hy sharef orston ki on per pabandinan utni hi ziada aisa akhir kion:konfused:
Enjoy;)
Personally, what I feel about Hayaa/Sharm is that yes, it comes from within to some extent but environment and upbringing plays a major role…It should be imbibed right since childhood so that it becomes concrete when a kid grows up…I remember myself being constantly instructed about the proper ways of sitting, walking, standing and even sleeping and it has remained with me ever since…
Although, us desis and our families like to talk about how “behayaa” these gora and kaala people are, I actually find non-desis to be more baa-hayaa in so many ways than desis…Just pulling a scarf or topi on your head doesn’t make you baa-hayaa..It’s far more than that…
That's such a good point, yes, wearing hijab and topi isn't enough, it's the behaviour that's important. I've seen people in my family and people who aren't family alike behaving in all kinds of manners. Even people who did hadj and/or umra. Yet nobody cares what they do, because they wear hijab or have the 'title' hadji/hadja.
It also depends on where you live. Sometimes people misinterpret your behaviour and intentions. I started to wear hiyab of my own choice some years ago, I was reading more about Islam, I wanted to know what real Islam was, because my parents, my family follow wrong Islam, they have too much cultural Islam, and because of that, culture is more important for them than Islam even though they wouldn't always admit that in front of others.
Anyway, people reacted strangely, when I started to wear hijab. I was becoming more religious. I wanted to do everything as it's really supposed to be done. So I also stopped shaking hands with males, stopped looking in the eyes of males, only went out with hijab, etc. Niqab is something I don't agree with, so that I never used. But it was misinterpreted, I was only interested in my religion. And people started to lie about me. "Why does she cover herself completely?" - "Why doesn't she shake hands any more with males?" - "Why does she only talk now with males if necesary and why does she ignore them when she doesn't have to talk to them?" - "Why doesn't she look at males?" - "Why doesn't she show her body line, she wears clothes that don't fit tight on her body?" - etc. etc. etc. I don't live in an Islamic country. They give you many problems and they make up lies against you here if you want to live as you're supposed to according to Islam. You can't really do parda if you're alone here. You get in trouble if you do that.
So I guess it all depends on the females character, upbringing, but also where she lives. It's difficult to be 'completely' Islamic in everything, if you live in a non-Islamic country. Even if you do have hayaa or sharm.
isi liy tu main apna point of view bata rahi hon:wink:
Oh ok great ghungat nikaley sharmai lajai khwateen ki kami hoti ja rahi hy;) Ghongat nikal ker 24 ghanty rakhna really bara mushkil hy patta nahi pehly zamany ki oratain kaisy rakhti thain her waqat:hmmm: Kabhi ghar main tajarba ker ky dykhu. ye laaamba sa ghngat karh ker chalo phiro andaza hu ga.
Gunnu just imagine going to a corporate job with a ghunghat and gota 
?