having friends of opposite gender after being committed/married

[pak2015]

Re: having friends of opposite gender after being committed/married

@htmwrites

I personally don’t have very many male friends. The ones that are there are all work guys (married, single etc) but none that i give the liberty to interact so frankly with me. I’ve kept it like this my whole life because a) i don’t like the idea of people forming ideas about me that i wouldnt like formed b) my idea of friends is very different from most people. The only true friendship i have is with my bro and sis. Other people that i meet are just classified as acquaintances in my opinion because i never let the friendship get that far.

Hence, in regards to your thread, no, i wouldn’t appreciate my future husband going cross country to help another female only because i would never do the same. If she needs monetary help or anything of the sort, i wouldn’t mind at all, he can send money and goods to help her out.
On the other hand, i understand not everyone has lived a life like mine. Many people now form close friendships with the opposite sex and keep it strictly platonic so i’m not one to judge their lifestyle. Hence, if my future husband did have female friends who were close to him (in terms of friendship), i would be willing to evaluate how important it is to go. If i feel like i’m not comfortable with it, yet this person is relying on him, then i’d probably go with him and help her out too. I would never want to compromise his friendly and caring character amongst his friends (making an assumption here, lol) just because he married me.

I guess what i’m saying is, it’s a give and take as long as he is loyal to me. I’ll go to lengths for him, if he’s committed to me wholeheartedly. I would also hope he would extend the same courtesy if i had to travel cross country for a work thing without flipping out over male colleagues especially since he knows how distant i am with them. Again..give and take.

you really think most guy and girls can strictly keep it platonic without at least one of the persons not falling for the other? by definition being friends with someone is being close to the person, and when people of opposite sex become close, a form of intimacy is created by definition and it often leads to one or the other having feelings for the other, even if they don’t act on those feelings