~GupOscars 2010~
Salams guppies and their brother gups. So as I stand here awaiting the members of GS to walk through the red carpet I’m going to use my cam to close up on some of the hot stuff walking past me. Well of course you want to know what I am wearing, the sexiness that is Alexander McQueen designed my chaddis for me personally…big up to A.McQ! RIP yo. 
So first off the hostess with the mostest this evening, would be the stunning Niksik…the lioness who let the awards revolve around her den. She stops to make small talk in her gorgeous baby pink silk embellished Marchesa gown. 
Hot hot hot!
I then hear the mixed roars of boos and hurrah’s as **nadz123 **tows along the carpet in her beautiful Givenchy number. Isn’t she looking stunning for a nut case (joke, don’t tell her that’s what we all think eh! She might pull out the ‘new thread’ button 
)
Following her gracious walk in to the Awards Hall, is one of the resident trolloony’s Monk! Dressed to impress in a remarkable Calvin Klein 3-piece suit, he looks nothing like the monster he acts in life1! Whaddaya know, he might just get lucky tonight too 
And the rest of the ladies including PCG, **Reha **and **Deeba1234 **make their way through in their corsets and their floor length gowns, not to mention those never ending high heels and sparkling gems all over! No question in mind that they’re looking as beautiful as ever.
Oh but, there has to be one who stands out from the rest, and that has GOT to be the one and only…redvelvet! Her sultry dark red Roberto Cavalli gown, with a simple yet divine Swarovski embellished neckline steals the top spot for the ladies as she so gracefully walks across the red carpet.
Now the men, some I have to say…failed to impress inordinately! **Shak09 **being the one to show up in his battered old jeans and a hoodie, with some of the crassest selection of reggae I’ve ever come across. My God, who died!!! Unfortunately, some things not even **Psyah **can dig a positive about.
Moving swiftly onwards, we see some new faces. **Diwana **and **Jaanwar **make their way through, insanely focussed on an issue at hand they both run into the Awards Hall, where they will probably continue the little love banter through the whole night making my speech seem somewhat mundane, which will most probably irritate me enough to throw the pair out the Hall!
Now walking past in his slick Hugo Boss tuxedo, is partyslims. Make no mistake **he **is in fact a **he **and has been a **he **since **he **was born. And ofcourse, last but definitely not the least is the notable queer…who quite clearly, takes the gents’ top spot with his mighty fine yet wise one liners and a crisp Armani suit.
And now that I’ve made my way on to the stage, with everybody sitting silently and the guards ready to throw out **EDAL **and **lahori99 **if they don’t stop talking. Not to mention if I get one more complaint from the ladies about **Jafri’s **futile attempts at flirting with them…I’ll be throwing everyone but the winners out of here. We’re going military style with life1. 
Any ways displays a huge, innocent grin
And the winners are…
Troll of life1 – **EDAL **takes it away!
Most loony – **Monk **has all rights reserved for this one.
Most eligible – **arafat **without a doubt, a mile ahead of the rest!
Most wisest – **redvelvet **steals the spotlight twice in one night!? My oh my.
Rishta aunty – **maroush **has this one down to a point!
Biggest drama queen – nadz123, is ultimately ruler of this category
Best couple – TLK and Niksik were up against ridiculously tough competition but their love has won them to the top
Thank you all for such a lovely time, these awards are nothing without your nominations and your votes. We truly appreciate it 
Slides his arm around Khumar and walks away in to the sunset
Under 18’s…get home. The rest, enjoy the after party. HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM AT ALL TIMES. BarbieCue, take your weird Irish booze elsewhere…I’m watching you. gives evil glare
Buh bye.
