But he has an obligation towards his wife and to be born child. It s not that his parents are in dire need. According to her they are wealthy people so if he doesn't send them money for a little time period due to his financial situation then it should be considered ok. I mean that is just my opinion based on her situation.
It doesn't matter sis that they need or not.
I'm sorry that I mis understood that you.
Re: giving money to inlaws
ShinningStar you are comparing two different situations .. when your brother sent the money to your mother --- she needed it. However, in this case, husbands parents are well off and they are not in need .. rather his wife (and soon to be born kid) is in need of a house.. so you tell me which investment makes more sense right now? Allah ko kiya jawab dey ga apnay biwi aur bachoon kay haqooq kay baray mein?
IMO I think they should buy gifts for them and not give money since they are not in need of it. Of course it would be entirely different if they couldnt afford things. Some parents may get offended by such a gesture. I know my parents would have.
Why your brother and father are telling him what he should do. Its dhud be between your husband and his parents.
well I think that is considerate of them to suggest something like that. dont u think? how many samduns think like that let alone suggest it.
Why your brother and father are telling him what he should do. Its dhud be between your husband and his parents.
and the wife. uss ka haq bhi banta hai ke nahi????
:k:
a person should give money where money is needed first.
Re: giving money to inlaws
The couple is still financially not so stable, they are living at the girl's parents' home. Before they can send money to guy's rich parents, they should make sure they themselves are financially stable, able to rent their own place, and able to manage all their expenses. Once they can then it is ok to send the wealthy parents whatever they want.
Re: giving money to inlaws
I miss understood that you are not muslim.
I miss understood that you are not muslim.
So what it has to do with this thread.
And honestly after all the crap you said to me yesterday, I damn care what you think.
Now please don't derail this thread.
Thankyou!
Re: giving money to inlaws
I am not camparing i told that kay maan baap ka dil khush honay say kitna faida hota hai.
Need ho kay na ho. Koi force naheen lakain kharch karain parents pay to achcha hai. I mean apna hi faida hai.
auron ko help karne se pehle apne pehrons par karah hona zaroori heh..
...when the guy is strugglin himself..shouldnt he make sure he himself is financially stable(at least having his own place) beofre goign out and helping his family that dont immediately need such help and htat never asked for it?..it just seems like common snense to me..
all this other stuff about duaains..aur ull get it back..seems like so much bull****..not even funny..
Re: giving money to inlaws
its makes sense for your husband to first make something of himself before starting to send money. what use will that money be to his parents if they find out that after sending it to them he is struggling? once you have settled down (inshalla) and can afford to send them money then do so.
second point, his parents may never ask him to send them money but it will make them feel proud when he does. my brother gave most of his first paycheck to my mum (she doesnt need it, may i add) and the rest he distributed amongst the family i.e me my nephews bhabi, and got my dad a present. when i asked him why he gave us all of the money he had earned, he said 'mum and dad are the reason i earned this money by paying for my education and making me the man i am today, and you guys are my family and i want to share my happiness with you'. i thought this was uber cute...very thoughful of him.
since my husband came to aus, my parents are fully supporting us. they paid for our visit to pak and even gave me spending money as well. they have bought us a car,boughts us our furniture-in pak and in aus and my dad wants us to live with them, maybe forever.
but my husband's parents have told us that if we want, we can move out but they will not help us financially. they dont mind if he leaves his education. but my dad wont let him stop his education as he thinks without higher education, a person is nothing.
his parents have said manytimes that we should make our own life and not expect anything from them. and they would be happy as long as we can support ourselves.
and my husband wants to move out after we have our baby. if we move out, his and my parents know that we can not afford as rents are so high. i know many people with full time jobs they are struggling.
but sometimes i feel that they do expect us to send them money. we can not afford to send them monthly or weekly. may be one a while we be able to send on eid or some other day. but if we do send them once, they will be expecting that we send them on a continuous basis even though they are well off. they are changing cars every few months and are living very luxerious life than us.
i am totally lost as if i look at our future, we need money, that we have been saving for over 2 years and they dont need our support. but when i look at my husband, he has a duty towards his parents. its not easy to decide as if i look at my baby's future, we have nothing that we can give him and will struggle to provide him/her decent lifestyle.
its makes sense for your husband to first make something of himself before starting to send money. what use will that money be to his parents if they find out that after sending it to them he is struggling? once you have settled down (inshalla) and can afford to send them money then do so.
second point, his parents may never ask him to send them money but it will make them feel proud when he does. my brother gave most of his first paycheck to my mum (she doesnt need it, may i add) and the rest he distributed amongst the family i.e me my nephews bhabi, and got my dad a present. when i asked him why he gave us all of the money he had earned, he said 'mum and dad are the reason i earned this money by paying for my education and making me the man i am today, and you guys are my family and i want to share my happiness with you'. i thought this was uber cute...very thoughful of him.
Don't you get happy after getting things from your brother??
Don't you pray for your brother to have more and be happy cause he love you all???
They saved money 25000 for saved money quran says best to spend on your parents.
Kabhi kabhi zaroorrat hoti hai per lugta naheen kay zaroorat hai. Who knows jo nazar ata hai sirf nazar hi ata hai ya haqeeqat bhi hai.
Main to inta kahti hoon dil say nikli maan baap ki dua sub say aham hoti hai agar thora bohat day dain to Allah doosray tareeqon say deta hai, kaam main bhalai deta hai aur taraqqi deta hai.
Baat samajhnay ki hai. Baaz dimagh aisi aham baton ko samajhnay say qasir hota hai.
Aur haan bohat say logon say maazrat kay saath SOOD pay ghar layna koi aqalmandi naheen sood lenay ka matlub Allah say jung hai.
Bohat say loag ghar kay baghair sari zindagi guzartay hain aur mar khup bhi jaatain hain.
since my husband came to aus, my parents are fully supporting us. they paid for our visit to pak and even gave me spending money as well. they have bought us a car,boughts us our furniture-in pak and in aus and my dad wants us to live with them, maybe forever.
but my husband's parents have told us that if we want, we can move out but they will not help us financially. they dont mind if he leaves his education. but my dad wont let him stop his education as he thinks without higher education, a person is nothing.
his parents have said manytimes that we should make our own life and not expect anything from them. and they would be happy as long as we can support ourselves.
and my husband wants to move out after we have our baby. if we move out, his and my parents know that we can not afford as rents are so high. i know many people with full time jobs they are struggling.
but sometimes i feel that they do expect us to send them money. we can not afford to send them monthly or weekly. may be one a while we be able to send on eid or some other day. but if we do send them once, they will be expecting that we send them on a continuous basis even though they are well off. they are changing cars every few months and are living very luxerious life than us.
i am totally lost as if i look at our future, we need money, that we have been saving for over 2 years and they dont need our support. but when i look at my husband, he has a duty towards his parents. its not easy to decide as if i look at my baby's future, we have nothing that we can give him and will struggle to provide him/her decent lifestyle.
The more my husband gives to his parents, the more Allah increases our rizq, this is my personal experience and according to my understanding nafaqah is something that you must spend on your parents and wife and children.
I think you can afford to send 100 dollars after every 3/4 months or is it too much?
The more my husband gives to his parents, the more Allah increases our rizq, this is my personal experience and according to my understanding nafaqah is something that you must spend on your parents and wife and children.
I think you can afford to send 100 dollars after every 3/4 months or is it too much?
Exactly!!!
I believe in that too. Denay say rizq main izafa hota hai aur Allah bhi khush aur uskay bunday bhi khush.
Re: giving money to inlaws
if they dont need it havent asked for it then y send it?
**Don't you get happy after getting things from your brother??
Don't you pray for your brother to have more and be happy cause he love you all???**
They saved money 25000 for saved money quran says best to spend on your parents.
Kabhi kabhi zaroorrat hoti hai per lugta naheen kay zaroorat hai. Who knows jo nazar ata hai sirf nazar hi ata hai ya haqeeqat bhi hai.
Main to inta kahti hoon dil say nikli maan baap ki dua sub say aham hoti hai agar thora bohat day dain to Allah doosray tareeqon say deta hai, kaam main bhalai deta hai aur taraqqi deta hai.
Baat samajhnay ki hai. Baaz dimagh aisi aham baton ko samajhnay say qasir hota hai.
Aur haan bohat say logon say maazrat kay saath SOOD pay ghar layna koi aqalmandi naheen sood lenay ka matlub Allah say jung hai.
Bohat say loag ghar kay baghair sari zindagi guzartay hain aur mar khup bhi jaatain hain.
i'm not saying i wasnt, all im saying is that if he hadve needed that money to do something else i wouldnt have taken it from him. if he had needed it to improve his life in some way i wouldnt expect him to give me anything.
zaroori yeh nahin hain kay vo mujhe kuch day tho phir hi meray dil say dua nikhligi. im sure alll parents do dua for their kids no matter how good/bad they are. m point was he should start sending the money when he himself is living a stable life...