Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Let’s say you are seriously considering a guy for marriage and he likes you also. Baath paaki hogayi. He asks you about your past so that there are no surprises after marriage and he has agreed to disclose his also. Will you (1) be completely honest and upfront or (2) be honest but hide certain things or (3) completely deny any past?

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Here we go again. Wasnt there a similar thread.

Anyhoo best is to not lie and not dwell or ask about past. Its past for a reason. What good will knowing do?

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

we did and it was moved to trash folder or some place. smh, why are folks so insecure.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Girls do this.. girls do that.. is it me or is there a bit of an obsession with girls’ behaviour..

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

I think its the men who’s past we need to be concerned about.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

I will definitely hide certain things. Does my husband really need to know I had a crush in 2012 and we whatsapped for a whole month? I don’t even think about that person, and nor do they think about me…I literally don’t know if they are dead or alive…but mentioning it would probably fill my husband’s mind with doubts. I think it’s unnecessary. I would tell about any long or major relationship.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

exactly what I was going to write @jalebi121

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Us men folk just can’t stop thinking about them girls.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Being a guy, I would say
pagel ho kya :smiley:
na , mai toh kuch ni bataun never :smiley:

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

  1. Be honest but hide some facts, which I may choose to reveal after marriage. These would not be issues that would affect our life together, but I wouldn’t trust him with that knowledge until we are in a full committed relationship. Engagements fall apart… can never be sure of anything.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Insecure? Elaborate please.
So you would be ok if your other half has a past & has done some nasty stuff & on top of that she doesn’t bother to tell you?

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Yeah its not insecurity unless the guy or girl constantly brings it up in every unrelated argument or becomes suspicious or accusatory or use the past to make the person feel guilty. I’m not advocating or condoning any of that. That’s wrong to do. But not wanting a partner who does not have a SEXUAL past is not insecurity. Everyone will have some sort of past in terms of crushes or talking to opposite sex they’re attracted to, I’m not talking about that type of past. I’m talking about people who have been intimate in the past. Was curious how girls would handle that with their future husband. Would they lie, hide or have full disclosure? Or would they find other guys who have similar past? Just wanted to hear their mindset but they got offended lol. Not insecurity.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Thanks for taking the time to answer honestly. Yeah I agree no need to discuss every crush, was talking more about actual relationships where intimacy was involved.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Thanks for taking time to reply and answering honestly. Don’t you think waiting after marriage or even engagement is risky? I understand not sharing everything right away until there is trust but what happens if it backfires if you wait after marriage or engagement?

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

This why I specified it would be issues I know would not, or should not affect our life together. E.g, if asked, I would say if there was anyone I was serious about before. What happened, why it didn’t work out, family issues, yadda yadda, no. I think it makes a difference though if it’s love or arranged marriage. In love marriage, two individuals want to be with each other, aside from family pressure, so it would be easier to trust the other person as I know who I am dealing with (at least I hope so lol). In an arranged situation, you have no idea who you’re dealing with until a good amount of time is invested in the relationship, and everything is dictated by family values/traditions, which makes the situation difficult (let’s face it, two mutually honest people who are genuinely sincere is the rarest thing in a situation like that). Hopefully by the time we get married, there will be enough trust that it won’t backfire. If it does, then obviously I’ve made the wrong call and that’s on me.

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

I would be honest, but I also have nothing to hide. I could tell him all about the crushes that I had in high school lol

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

In a dating scenario, this is not a big deal. If a couple meets in school or work and dates for a few months…even years before engagement/marriage, they already know plenty.

Your question here goes more towards arranged marriage. Let’s be real. Do you know of ANY person, guy or girl, who flat out asked a potential rishta during a arranged situation if they had intimate relationships in the past? And given that families from both sides, and often aunties from the community are involved in a arranged situation…what do you think a Pakistani girl will say regarding this if asked by a guy she barely knows even IF she has been intimate with someone?

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

men and women, both living lives of cliches. im interested in neither.
ya’ll talk too much

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

Sure. If he has questions, he can go ahead and ask but i’d probably answer like some of the other girls said above. He doesn’t need to know about my ridiculous crush on Orlando Bloom or how George Clooney’s salt and pepper hair makes me swoon. Lol, he’d have a fit every time i watched one of their movies. That aside, anything that would effect a relationship would be answered with 100% honesty.. ask away, ain’t got nuffin to hide. Being a good kid growing up has it’s advantages. lol

Re: Girls would you lie about your past to your future husband?

In all fairness, while I never asked this question of a guy, I was asked this question, point-blank by two guys. These guys were in the minority - most guys are a lot more tactful and can suss this out without asking pointed questions - but the world is made up of all sorts. And most memorable of the two guys, was the guy who admitted that he had a very colourful past and couldn’t remember or count off with any certainty exactly how many girls he had slept with :disgust: