My mom didn’t let us do our eyebrows, paint nails or waxing until we were 16. We were OK and didn’t feel the pressure. I see little girls these days who seem to have grown up all too fast.
Is it peer pressure? What’s the going age these days?
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
This is a touchy subject in our household…
I did my eyebrows when i was 18… they are a pretty decent shape anyway.
I wasn’t allowed to wear nail polish to school… only on special occasions.
Same goes for make-up - a bit of lipstick on special occasions only.
And those are the rules in my house for my girls also:snooty:.
I’ve written this before and I’ll write it again; the sight of a young pre-pubescent girl wearing knee high boots, a see-through white skirt, a visible thong, and a face full of make-up is just WRONG. After i saw this on the streets of London, my heart just sank 
^ Ugh, I feel your pain Maroush. A couple of years ago I thought I was gonna go ballistic when I spotted a really young girl (looked about 8-9 years old) wearing a t-shirt that said 'Future MILF.'
Not a mom yet but I'll also fall on the more conservative end when it comes to cosmetics, etc. And same goes for my sons wearing t-shirts with hoochie phrases, sillhouettes of naked chicks, etc.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
I don't think nailpolish is a big deal, especially in more playful shades.
No daughter of mine is wearing lipstick before she's well into her late teens. Some thin liner, a bit of gloss, and some concealer for blemishes is fine with me at around 12ish.
As for hair removal, I really advise you all to guide your daughters if you notice it is bothering them. If you don't, they'll try to take care of it themselves, and it will probably not be in a smart or safe manner. Facial hair in particular can be very embarrassing for girls. And many have a lot when they are young. If they show any indication that they need help dealing with it, please help them. Don't ignore the problem.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
u do know that most girls once u drop them off to school will wear makeup...right? :)
imo hs is a time to experiment with makeup and stuff..my mom took me to get my brows done when i was 14...but they were super strict about my dressing (and still are..blah)..
its hard being/raising a girl.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
I didn't wear make-up at school....neither did my sister, or any of my cousins for that matter. At that age, we simply never had any interest in it. Our parents never said "you must NOT wear make-up else there will be serious repercussions"... i think it's when there is that element of "i am telling you " that children feel controlled and suffocated, especially at "that age"... hence feel like breaking out and rebelling against their parents. It was explained to us that it was simply not appropriate for our age. Anyway i was too busy being a tomboy nerd to grasp the concept of makeup. With my daughters, it may be different, so i'll have to approach it from a different angle... we'll see, but thanks for the heads up. :)
I agree with you Sahar about the hair thing. I remember whilst at school some girl tried to shave her 'tache in the bathroom and cut her lip open..! It's better to tackle the issue head-on, rather than hiding behind your own pride and rigid rules. They are your children after all, you have to do what is the best for them. And i wouldn't want my kids to be embarassed :)
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
PEER PRESSURE AND TOO MUCH TV EFFECT.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
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Re: Girls and beauty treatments
Yes I guess the more you stop them the more they will do it.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
i did my eyebrows at 17. my mom was against it and still is ; ). makeup and stuff i wasn't into until 17 either. i did face pressure tho and tried to do it sometimes. but there is a time for these things i feel and with time i just naturally became good at it. it's disturbing to see middle school grls dressed up as models. and too much makeup disgusts me any day. simplicity is better and a natural healthy glowing skin is most necessary. i think there is a difference between being clean and presentable and a face full of makeup. girls should be taught to maintain themselves. i feel desi parents either get thm too involved in these things, or have them neglect it completly.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
My mom hadn't been strict with me, but since my eyebrows were in a fairly good shape, I didn't get them done until I was 18 or 19. Hair removal was a must. There was never a question about it, and there shouldn't be either. I wasn't really into makeup to begin with, but mom was fine with a lip gloss or a light shade of lipstick once in a while (once I started high school.)
I know what you mean about seeing little girls wearing model-makeup. OMG! It's just sad. (Reminds me of Toddlers and Tiaras.) :-\ I have a daughter now, and there's no way in hell I'm going to let her near makeup until she's well into her teens.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
u know it coudl be worse... instead of girls wearing makeup and sporting fishnets and thongs..it could be boys.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
^ LOL! halarious
I was never into makeup.. however mum allowed me to wear lipstick at around 14+ when we used to go to desi events.
Mum knew i was a tomboy, so it was never an issue.
In regards to hair removal.. i dont think one should be stopped. A girl who goes to school and gets teased, will be left with scars. I still remember being in yr 7 and being teased like hell for my hairy arms and legs. And this is because i was too scared to use the Epilady... my mum handed it to me at 12 but i cried like mad cus i didnt want to get it done. Thank goodness for wax though!
neways, once i started waxing.. there was no going back... even my gore friends caught on with the arm waxing. Eyebrows however, i did not touch till i was 17. Didnt have much hair there.. so it was ok.
I'll do the same with my daughter.
But, clothes, completely different story. No minis
My mom didn't let us do our eyebrows, paint nails or waxing until we were 16. We were OK and didn't feel the pressure. I see little girls these days who seem to have grown up all too fast.
Is it peer pressure? What's the going age these days?
Peer pressure, in my opinion, is the bigger cause. Kids will go home and tell their parents about the latest backpack all the others kids are wearing.....or the coolest shoes that all their friends have except them, etc etc. LOL....it brings back memories. I remember being around 15 and telling my mom that "all the other girls are dying their hair"....or...."other girls are wearing eyeliner".....or...."other girls are bleaching/plucking/wearing a certain brand of lipstick."
I started wearing a little makeup...just a very thing layer eyeliner and lipgloss or lipstick....around 14-15. I kept it simple. I wasn't crazy about foundation or blush or eyeshadow as I don't like putting too many chemicals on my face. And even now as an adult.....I prefer only lipgloss and eyeliner. And occassionaly use foundation/blush/eyeshadow for special events or if look super tired.
I've noticed that many girls who were crazy about makeup as kids....continue that passion as adults as well. With me...it was the opposite. I LOVED playing with my mom's makeup as a kid.......but now.....I just like a more natural look.
Also....let's not forget that kids are bombarded with media images of their favorite stars dressed a certain way. That can play a role as well...in starting a trend...among kids in school.
I taught middle school and noticed that regardless of the influences out there....A LOT depends on parental involvement. I've seen girls in middle school who pluck their eyebrows super thin.....dress in super skin-tight clothes....act years above their age.....and get involved in dangerous activities..........and you can rarely get a hold of their parents for a conference or even on the phone. Often times such parents are unaware and also don't care that their kid is flunking out in school and has a disturbing attitude and social life. The kids who **ARE **more grounded, successful in school, have a healthy attitude......also have very involved parents.
*****You have to understand that your daughters might come up to you and say "Mommy the other girls are wearing nailpolish/lipstick/dying their hair, etc"......and if you don't agree with this behavior you firmly tell them that you are not allowed to use makeup until you get to a certain age (16 for example). And other moms......they find ways to compromise with their daughters. If they don't want their daugthers wearing lipstick in the 8th grade.....they'll settle for a lip gloss that has very little color to it.
**The hair issue....I agree with **Sadzzz. It's not a girl's fault if she's only 12-14 and has thick hair on her legs....upper lips....and bushy eyebrows. Kids can be cruel and this can hurt confidence. So, in situations like that....I think it's okay for her to shave/wax/ look neater. There's a difference between looking "neater" and simply "overdone" or "over the top."
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
i wonder if we can teach kids that other kids are just mini-jerks and should brush off insults?
i was teased once about my hairy arms (amongst a 101 other things) but even then I thought it was weird. cz my arms aren't that crazy hairy. but that girl was fugly any way
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
I don't know if I was a late bloomer or what, but I wore makeup for the first time when I was 19.5. I had never worn it in my life before that and even then it was just eyeliner and a bit of mascara that I started with.
Even now, I don't wear makeup other than special occassions.
I would probably not let my girls wear makeup to school before 17. On special occasions like weddings they can wear it if they are 15 and up.
As for hair removal, that should be allowed whenever the hair becomes embarrasing or an issue for the girl.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
i think a lot of it depends on how your kids see you act and behave as they are growing up. i think it comes down what they grow up thinking as important and necessary. depends how they actually FEEL about themselves. so i think ppl need to work towards making them confident and definitely prevent any bullying due to things that can be avoided, like hair removal should not be an issue.
Re: Girls and beauty treatments
I was not allowed , makeup, nail polish etc etc.. when i was in school... And i still don't wear...
I think got my upper lips done for the first time, when i was 16 or so.... tht was actually when one of my cousin teased me alot..
I still don't do my eye-brows... Alhumdulilah happy i don;t have really really thick ones... My mum don't get them aswell...
waiting to get married to wear make-up, lol... i guess im one of those who gets all dressed up after shaadi, hehe...
i think a lot of it depends on how your kids see you act and behave as they are growing up. i think it comes down what they grow up thinking as important and necessary. depends how they actually FEEL about themselves. so i think ppl need to work towards making them confident and definitely prevent any bullying due to things that can be avoided, like hair removal should not be an issue.
I was going to give a similar response. Aside from forbidding them to wear make-up until a certain age, we should be helping build thier confidence so they do not feel the need to do something only because everyone else is doing it. I also think it depends on how the parents are, kids pick up a lot from them. Growing up my mom was pretty simple & I was surrounded by boys so I was more of a tomboy and never really into the make up thing. I don't think id like for my daughter to wear makeup until she is 17-18 or so. Yeah maybe a natural lip gloss, a little bit will be ok, but not full on party makeup to school. THere is no need. And I am completelyyyy against little eensy weensy kids dressing much older than their age. Dunno what life will throw me, but I hope I can prevent that and teach her a good way to dress without forcing it. As we all know, when you enforce too rigidly, that is when kids want to rebel.