ghar jamaai

Lifestyle Relationships
21

Re: ghar jamaai

No need to get so excited^

I would not prefer it

---self-respect---

22

Re: ghar jamaai

Any guy with half a brain...and an ounce of self-respect wouldn't..........

23

Re: ghar jamaai

Can someone please shed some light on the difference between a married guy, not working and living for free in his parents house with his wife, or vice versa?

24

Re: ghar jamaai

none whatsoever. It's the parent's responsibility to look after their children [irrespective of their ages] and grand children IF and only IF the son/daughter can't earn their living for some REASONABLE and UNAVOIDABLE circumstances. It's NOT their LEGAL responsibility but it's a MORAL and PARENTAL obligation. :)...at least that's what i believe in. :)

25

Re: ghar jamaai

I think what people are saying is that women dont have half a brain or self respect…:konfused:

26

Re: ghar jamaai

yeah true, like a few of you have said that theres no harm in living with inlaws but then there are some cases where the guys get relaxed because they are living in their in laws and therefore dont bother finding a job to move out, thats where there is no respect for the son in law

but i guess its ok if its temporary but the guy must be then willing to go find a job and help contribute towards the purchase of their home so they can move out as soon as possible, thats where the respect lies.

27

Re: ghar jamaai

wats the big deal .. damad is their son also .. is he not ? .. bahu can sit n relaxz in husbands home .. somtimes even like in pakstn guy doesnt have a job .. they all eat off of his parents .. so then y is it so wrong when the guy does it if his in laws can afford it ? .. obviously he wouldnt be just sitting there if he could fnd a job @ that particular time now would he ? ..

28

Re: ghar jamaai

Thats not what i said..........i said a 'guy' with a half a brain.......not a 'person'.......only referring to the guys..

its basic stuff.......women don't respect a man who can't provide for them.....simple......... (in most of the cases...exceptions might be there)

and i am not talking here about guy who is looking after taking care of the in-laws.....i am talking in the conventional sense of teh word 'ghar jamaai' as it is commonly understood.......

29

Re: ghar jamaai

oh I'd love to be ghar jamiee if my suser has money like Warren buffett, Bill Gates or even Sheikh Bin Al Banyan

:)

30

Re: ghar jamaai

eyyy nooooo

31

Re: ghar jamaai

i understand what you were saying, I was just pointing out to our differing societal taboos etc based on stoppit's enquiry.

32

Re: ghar jamaai

But couldn't that apply to living with** either** set of parents.. (unless like u said they need looking after)..

I would have thought sponging off parents would be equally likely if he was living with his.. To me there doesn't seem to be much of a difference except one is considered more socially acceptable..

33

Re: ghar jamaai

With no disrespect to anybody and with some respect to myself i say that;

Usually the pakistani guys that come and live with foreign in-laws by marriages are cousins already so it is in one sense for the guy to be living in his wn other house.
However for 'out of family marriage' i would never prefer to live in my in-laws house as it questions my being a man.
Concurently, it is by in pakistani custom consider as an insult to ask a guy to live in his fathers in laws house.
There is a grave differance between a guy living in his wifes house than living in his house. By religion and tradition a man is meant to be the protector and provider of a women and family and a girl gets married to him because she needs this very security of his ...
I would not live in my in-laws house even temporarily.

34

Re: ghar jamaai

wen i get married, i would have objections to having my hubz become a ghar damaad

i would try to avoid as much as possible any situation which would cause us to go that route even temporarily

35

Re: ghar jamaai

Don't see any problem with that.

36

Re: ghar jamaai

Wow i didnt realise how much of a big deal it was! It mostly seems to be about ego for the guys though, that's the impression i get.
Well my hubby is from Pakistan, my dad is also his mamu and we live with my parents cos buying a house is just impossible for us at the moment. He's working, i am looking for work, he contributes to household expenses and i have the utmost respect for him. He would love for us to move out, but it wont happen for a while. I knew when i married we wouldnt be able to buy a house straightaway, but i was ok with it. it wasnt the most important thing to me.

37

Re: ghar jamaai

not only ego....other factors too.........since your are related its normal for you guys.....

38

Re: ghar jamaai

^ yeaaaah i guess cos of the relation, maybe its not an issue, but if we werent related and in this situation, i would have no problem with it. hubby might i guess though.

39

Re: ghar jamaai

situation wouldn’t be like THIS if u weren’t related…in the first place :hehe:

40

Re: ghar jamaai

Why not ? Yes I like the idea of retiring early.