Forgiving a Spouse

Lifestyle Relationships
41

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

If there are no kids involved, I ll ask for divorce. Before divorce i ll give him few zor-daar thappars across his face.

If there are kids involved, then no divorce, few zor-daar thappars, and I and kids move out and live separately.

42

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

If ALLAH can forgive mistakes then why can't we, just saying.

But that doesn't mean the wife shouldn't pull out some heavy duty chiters for his face.

43

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

From an Islamic perspective that cannot be classified as 'cheating' so I'm not sure if there is anything to technically 'forgive.' But I would still feel no less cheated/deceived and would react the same way = leave.

I'm willing to give a lot in a spousal relationship and in return, I'm expecting a deep bond. If he can relegate me to the position of an alternate and offer part-time companionship at best and part-time fatherhood at best to children (if there are any) then that is not something I can ever be OK with. Furthermore, I don't think I could respect someone who introduces petty feelings of jealousy, competition, negativity etc. in a relationship which should be based on honor and commitment. But these are slightly secondary to the main reason: I simply don't have the ability to share my partner, whether it's a matter of one day or a chunk of my life-time. It's yukky too.

I'm just human and from the perspective of many people, my limits of how much mistreatment I can take from others happen to be very narrow and shallow.

44

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

I would never forget such a thing and neither could I forgive it... If God forbid there were kids involved then I'd let them choose thier own fate... if they were old enough to make a decision.... if not then I would let her keep the kids and leave.

What I could never do is kill the spouse ,maybe her lover, but that might be the gut reaction, probably not the right thing but hence why I would never even dream of such a scenario... it's just too damn dangerous to even contemplate.

If I was the wife then again i'd be tempted to kill the scumbag but if kids were involved I might think twice for thier sake...

45

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

Faris aap to hamesha seedhe seedhe jaan, khatl, khatra, hamla, dushmani, jung etc par aajate ho!

46

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

This is a hypothetical question. I was talking about my hypothetical husband’s hypothetical affair.

47

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

Such a good idea. Yeah he deseve's it. Forgive but don't forget and then I always hear Once a Cheater Always a Cheater so it's like a gamble.

48

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

Wait why do you want to kill bill the other wife?

49

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

Have an affair so she can leave u and u have chance to marry a different girl? So what about getting into an argument knowing that women always bring up u did this and that to me at this and that time what if u bring up the affair again not give him a chance to ever get past it. Say I forgive but secretly don't?

50

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

I dont know what I would do. Im not sure as Ive never been there. Who knows what would cross my mind.

I do know I would want to take my time to think about my next steps. No sudden moves out of anger.

51

Re: Forgiving a Spouse

it depends on what kind of spouse he was

if he was kind, caring, loving, respectful towards those that i cared for most then i would forgive and forget

i feel like when affairs as a result of a moment of weakness happen, it's the mistake of both spouses. maybe it's a sexless marriage. but if everything else is good then i see it as something that can be forgiven.

have to be in the situation to give an honest answer