Who in here used to be nice and now has turned into a really mean personality because people kept pushing something in their something? I think I am about to do that. I have decided not to stay a nice/helping/friendly person anymore because I can never please people, they still tend to find something that bothers them no matter how nice I am, so you know what, be that way and I’ll be that way too.
Instead of taking real life examples, let’s take an example from gupshup. People will keep doing something that’ll force me to take an action, and when I do take an action, then I get requests to make exceptions. Ofcourse I don’t make exceptions, then I get to hear “You are taking it too seriously, you are not the same friend anymore”. Ok. Fine. I agree. But they fail to see that they are testing me, they are starting it and forcing me to do something. If they love me so much as a friend, they wouldn’t put me in that situation where I have to make such decisions. People can’t see their own faults, but find fault in other people in a snap.
People behave like that in real life as well. They’ll keep pushing you and when you finally decide to do what you feel like doing, you get to hear “You are not the same person anymore”. Therefore, I’ll just stop caring and do whatever I feel like doing. If they think I am not the same anymore regardless of me bending backward for them, then fine, I am not the same anymore and I’ll show it to you.
Well true I may not change my personality because it’s really difficult but I can definitley change my action and start not-caring. I don’t care, I’ll do whatever it takes.
You know ive been going through same thing recently...and i know my attitude/actions have changed. Before, I would go around calling every friend just to have someoen to talk to about something, but now I avoid everyone. I'm adopting this "i dont give a crap" attitude anymore...and tell ya the truth.. it feels good when someone says "wow rnt u being mean?".....i know that's nto good though...
Yeah, dude, don’t ever be the “nice guy”. People will just step all over you. I was the “nice girl” for ONE year, and I’m still paying the price for it.
Just now, an old friend of mine calls and is like “Hey, I’m at the library and I need a study buddy - come one over”…then an hour later “Hi…I’ve been like calling your room and no one is picking up…call me back…need someone to study with”…in a really irritated tone, mind you.
Hell, what the hell do people think? I’m not some doggy that follows when someone calls.
Needless to say, I’m studying in THIS building tonite
^ no way... :) nice peopel never lose their respect... yes they get mistreated and misused, but the respect doesnt die... im a firm believer of niceness hehe
Hi Shiku :) **
**I can see myself in that coz first i was helping everyone but what do you get nothing! And the pple you helped only gossips about you so NO i dont will be that Nice and Helpfull Nilu again yea only for pplz who care for me or true friends. Its always like that if you to nice pple walk over you. So ive learnd what happend if you 2 nice for everyone.
You earn respect by treating others respectfully. I totally believe in this.
Shikra: i can understand your position and mind you it is only the position that requires you to take such steps (talking about your GS example). Don't loose hope man. :)
PCG ofcourse you are not a doggie (or a female dog for that matter). You are a pigni
Skhan I am not sure if you lose self respect, but after being so nice to them, when you decide to turn into a mean thing, it’s really hard and you feel bad, but you have to do it or else it eats you inside.
Nilu Way to go :k:
BKB I tried my best to be fair and I think I accomplished it too to some extent, but then the expectations kept growing, and growing, and growing. Instead of bending myself backward more, I decided to stand up straight for what I think is right and for what I feel like doing.
Shikra u r nice or not nice to people not b/c of how they r to u but b/c Allah has asked us to be nice to others...and the example of the Prophet (saw) is in front of us...he was nice to even his worst enemies...
so, dont change coz ppl are mean to u...Qayamat k din tumhara hisaab alag ho ga aur un ka alag...
also it could be a misunderstanding and maybe they didn't intend to be mean to u but u took it to heart? (i do that a lot)...
so...dont take it too seriously and continue to be nice...
Yaar samdhan jee woh baat tou theek hai k sab ka hisab alag alag hoga, but Allah is watching too. I am not a great person and have limited patience. I am very short tempered and I kept bearing all that behavior, but hopefully Allah understands what I feel :halo:
shikra i understand you. I have paid the price of being a nice guy many times..Yaar yehi duniya hai...If u keep on being nice to a person they will start to take u for granted. And then "you are not the same anymore" line kicks in. I am telling u very diffcult to change. If it is in ur nature to be nice u will conti9nue to remain nice and suffer from it.
Nice people never has anything to lose but certainly they must not let other to take them for granted. And if they r crossing their limits they must be taught a lesson for sure.
Being nice and being fool are two different things, :tweetie:
Why the hell would someone want to be nice any how, its borring, its time consumming and its waste of time and simply results in u getting used so dont care abt nothing and everyone will care about you.
I may not change my personality because it’s really difficult but I can definitley change my action and start not-caring. I don’t care, I’ll do whatever it takes.
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