ok people.. we all have financial problems, esp. when married. Do you give money to your parents without letting your partner know? Does your partner have any rights in knowing? If you are a man - it's understood you will give to support your parents. However, if your wife gives money to her parents, what are your views on it?
Yes hubby should let her wife know, when he gives money to his family! I guess its the wife right? And also wife have every right to giv money to her families if they need it! Infact hubby should also contribute to the economy!
Be it money or anything, if coulpe wants to keep their relationship good, trustworthy etc than they both should tell/share with each other of any things they do, its their right to tell/ and the rigths of ur partner to find out! :)
a big reason people in pak marry thier kids off to toher coutnries is so that they can get financial support adn setting bahar from them.
a lot of these families are not dying, meaning they have houses and cars in pak but they just want more more more. greedienss abound!! never satitsfied. lalchi scumbags. disgusting.
Losing their children is difficult. And many people may just want their kids to have better life.
You may be right though in some situations and it may not only be the money for themselves but the marriage of the daughter or having a chance to get visa.
Yeah my wife think that too. In fact most of the “girls” who know about both situations think that 2nd is worst ( ) why not first is worst? Why bring it to the point where parents have to talk to 3rd person (me) about it?
You are right! Approaching “you” as a son would have been the right thing to do. However, guys are truly stuck in a situation, meaning, even if they know and are aware of the 1st situation, they “quietly take it in” because they do not want to upset their mom. Mom’s should understand that by squeezing so much money out from the son - will leave him dry n’ drained. Cause now he will have an argument at home with the wife, and all of this for nothing.
I know a couple who recently got married. They both work full time. They are not living with the boys parents, because it’s too small. So they are renting. The boy’s mom is demanding for $600 every month from the son. I mean the guy is so sweet and is trying to do justice. His wife said then she want to give that much to her parents too, because, now all of her money was getting used up for rent and bills and all, and the guy was not even able to save enough each month. The guy is fine with it - that his wife give money to her parents too, so there is no fight at home.
However, imagine now combined $1200 per month - a luxury they can live into and buy a house and everything… but it’s not gonna happen. It’s truly messed up.
Mom's should understand that by squeezing so much money out from the son - will leave him dry n' drained. Cause now he will have an argument at home with the wife, and all of this for nothing.
His wife said then she want to give that much to her parents too, because, now all of her money was getting used up for rent and bills and all, and the guy was not even able to save enough each month. The guy is fine with it - that his wife give money to her parents too, so there is no fight at home.
However, imagine now combined $1200 per month - a luxury they can live into and buy a house and everything... but it's not gonna happen. It's truly messed up.
Some mothers will not have much money but choose not to say anything to their sons b/c they know their sons are struggling.
Maybe the couple is okay with not living a life of luxury if they know their parents are happy and comfortable? You mention they don't fight about it so maybe it is not a problem for them.
To look at it another way, didn't most parents (well immigrant parents at least) struggle at first, and sacrifice their own material needs for the needs of their kids? If the children realize and recognize that, mybe that's why they dont' have a problem giving money to the parents to live a nice life while they struggle a bit.
Okay dude chill–majority of them are not that bad.
Good point. The second is bad, but first one is just as bad too.. Is there a reason wy the son hasn’t sent money? IS he having problems or something? Is the wife giving him problems?
I think something like this is a case-to-case basis…yes the sn has a duty to give his parents money, especially if they are not in a position to earn and need the income. Son should realize that and do what he can; however, sometimes families will be completely fine but still want more for a lavish style just because it’s their right, and in that case it gets hard for the son to keep sending money and will cause tension with the family especially when they really have no savings/life of their own.
I've seen and experienced that helping out your parents financially does wonders for your own financial well-being. All of a sudden instead of feeling broke all the time, you find things work out perfectly in the end. There is blessing in your money.
i agree totally with mama3, its tough getting a job and making ends meet here in the west what with rent food bills taxes etc, another thing is that when someone marries to another, the bride stay in her husband place, and totally cut all ties from her parents, to make the marriage work, both partner commit to one another, its only if both are working that one of them may send money, to help dependants
) why not first is worst? Why bring it to the point where parents have to talk to 3rd person (me) about it?