The phone rings at FBI headquarters.
“Hello?”
“Hello, is this the FBI?”
“Yes. What do you want?”
“I’m calling to report my neighbor Adrian Thibodeaux! He is
hiding marijuana inside his firewood.”
“Thank you very much for the call, sir.”
The next day, the FBI agents descend on Thibodeaux’s house. They
search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust
open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at
Thibodeaux and leave.
The phone rings at Thibodeaux’s house.
“Hey, Adrian! Did the FBI come?”
“Yeah!”
“Did they chop your firewood?”
“Yep”
“Great, now it’s your turn to call. I need my garden plowed.”
At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men
or women were more trustworthy.
"No woman," said one man, scornfully, "can keep a secret."
"I don't know about that," huffily answered a woman guest. "I have
kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one."
"You'll let it out some day," the man insisted.
"I hardly think so!" responded the lady. "When a woman has kept
a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it forever."
Two Rednecks were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying
like hell. So the other asked, “Why are you crying?”
The first one replied, “I came here for blood test”
Second one asked, “So? Are you afraid?”
First one replied, “No, not that. During the blood test they cut
my finger”
Hearing this the second one started crying very loudly. The first
one was astonished and asked the other, “Why are you crying?”
The other replied, “I have come for my urine test.”
…