You best snap yourself out of this attitude soon, because this is exactly the type of mentality that has the potential to create problems with in-laws. In fact, in the few desi dramas where the DIL is portrayed as the antagonist…it’s because of such mentality.
You wouldn’t like it if your husband begrudged you spending time with your family (whether on the phone or in person)…and you wouldn’t like it if he disapproved of you spending some money on your family. Yes,…to a certain extent…it’s flattering to know that one’s spouse loves them very much and doesn’t want him/her all to themselves. But after a certain point, it’s not flattering…it makes a person look needy…and that is usually a turn-off to both genders.
Also, why do you get so possessive when he’s interacting with his family? That’s what you need to analyze. Are you afraid that you’re not important enough to him? Your feelings might be stemming from some insecurity or fear.
Try to understand that his family was in life for a much longer time before he started getting to know you on a deeper level. And his relationship with them is DIFFERENT from his relationship with you. The relationship he has with his parents and siblings CANNOT even be compared to his relationship with you. The interactions, expectations, and rights are all different. It’s like comparing apples to oranges and it can’t be done. This is the root cause of why MILS and DILS start hating on each other. One things the other is more loved. They fail to comprehend that the “love” one has toward their parents/siblings is different from what one feels for their spouse.
As far as spending money on his family is concerned…it shouldn’t be a problem as long as he’s not neglecting his financial responsibilities toward the marriage. And i think it is said Allah wants us to spend money on our loved ones. Spend on others, and Allah will spend on you.
