hey guys i need help trying to talk brain into someones head…
my friend is feeling like she didnt do good at her wedding,she didnt let it be memorable in the sense that she was not happy with makeup and clothes as she didnt have enough budget.she over-heard a few talking about her in her valima that she was so boring-looking that a paper bag could look better…i feel sorry for her.i dont know what to do.btw she is beautiful looking.
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
well first of all, i hope the people talking trash about her go to hell =)
secondly, tell her that things dont always turn out the way u want em to so she shouldnt worry too much about it..my cousin had really bad makeup on her wedding but you know what? since shes good looking ANYWAY she looks good now after her wedding..so tell ur friend to look xtra good when she sees those losers talking about her.
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
oh hon, that sucks. people talk trash all the time and they're not worth her getting upset over them or their dumb comments.
weddings are not as much about budgets as they are about the people and the attitude. our wedding was about half the budget or even less than what my friends spent, and they've all told me they had more fun at mine than they did at any other wedding they've attended. its not about the money or the clothes or the makeup, in the end about its the husband and wife and the fact that they pledged their lives to one another that day. tell your friend to focus on the positives about that day- about the fact that she had her health and her happiness, she married a great guy, she had her family and friends around her and people who really love her. clearly these people who made that comment were miserable and unhappy in their own lives and probably also jealous of what she has. and give her a hug from me :)
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
ppl hv talked about elaborate weddings, being too elaborate
cant do anything...ppl will talk so might as welll give thm smthng to talk about:D
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
exactly!!!!! like pink love sed i agree..... neways mayb later on wen she can afford it she could have a anniversary do and can get ready the way she wants and not invite the loosers!!!!
tell her shes gorgus neway and dusnt need 2 listen 2 any crap
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
you guys are great help.
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
It's not all about how much money you spend - it's definitely about what you make of the occasion..................
I spent £250 on my wedding dress, and only had the wedding reception hall decorated by professionals (not the Mehndi hall - that was DIY), spent only £250 on my wedding outfit and had traditional food and eating set up (think long tressle tables and paper plates!)..didn't have a valima or the dhol we'd planned (mum forgot to pick the dhol up from her friends house!), didn't have a "hen night".........BUT people to this day are saying that they have never had so much fun at a family wedding since our wedding......
This was said expecially at 2 recent weddings in the family one being my BIL's where they sepnt a fortune on food, clothes, decorating the halls and stuff......
I too felt like it wasn't upto scratch and that people would talk taht there was no Valima etc etc......but at the end of the day, it was my day...I was happy.......and hubby gave me loads of jewellery and clothes and stuff...which people didn't necessarily see...which have all gone to good use. Better to have spent on that than on things which only lasted the one day.........
Whats more important to me is that my family all came and made the effort to join in and had a good time.
And anyway......most people these days just go to the wedding, have the food and leave.....they don't even sit around and chat etc etc like in the old days!!!
I saw this at my own wedding, when so called friends o fmy mums were leaving the hall as I arrived in the wedding car!
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
Tell her at least she got to see herself as a bride and experience the whole feeling i know a few girls who unfortunately aren't....if someone goes from that phase they understand its not important how you look and how huge the whole event turns out to be and whether people praise you or the whole function...
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
The thing with us desis is that we are our own worst enemies with regards to stuff like this. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't.
I remember when my sister got married a few years ago, they had a very simple nikkah and that was it, mainly due to my sis and her husband not wanting a long engagement etc and also cos her in laws follow islam quite strictly. Even to the point that they didn't allow any pictures to be taken at the nikkah which obviously added fuel to the fire afterwards as it set the aunty brigade off with wild speculations about what kinda poverty my sister must've married into to not even have had any wedding pics.
My wedding, on the other hand, was pretty elaborate with guests lists of several hundred people on each day - this mainly because my husband was the last sibling to get married in his family so naturally they wanted to go all out. Which led to the same people who made comments about the simplicity of my sisters wedding a couple of years earlier now saying that the families had too much money to 'waste' and that if we're such religious families then we should've spent the money on performing Hajj's and donating to charity (both of which we do anyway, but oh well )
Okay, rant over now :)
Re: feeling bad and unclassy=(
oy, i love people like that! they can never makeup their minds whether to be happy for you or not 