Fear of marriage

[NomiCA]

Re: Fear of marriage

@CM

• Have you ever been in that place where idea of marriage was a nightmare?

Yup. Until the age of 25 I wanted to stay as a bachelor. Then at 25 moved to Darfur and realized that life sucks without having someone to share it with. Plus 5 years alone in Geneva didn’t help much with that either.

• Why was it a nightmare to you?

The nightmare is simple. You can not depend on women in this day and age. Most women specifically Pakistani women do not view marriage with the notion of compromise. It is their way or the high way. This is based on some retarded notion that they must strive for feminism when they have never actually suffered any sense of discrimination. Most of the women I know come from middle to upper class backgrounds. Meaning Master’ degrees in the US and UK. Fluent in 2 or 3 languages and think they all deserve George Clooney as husbands even though they act and look like Cruella Deville. They believe the standards their fathers maintained at the peak of their career must be maintained at the level of newly wed husbands. A lot of it is also has to do with the mixture of East and West and how well they balance it. It leads to a lot of confusion in their minds.

I didn’t mention it here I think, we had a Pakistani girl in my duty station who visited and my friends want me to hook up with her. While they were doing what they were doing one of them asked her what kinda of man she wants. She said I want him to be religious and liberal as well. Both (not muslim) started laughing. One said so you want a half a cat and half a dog. Note the contradiction and most Pakistani women want that and believe it is attainable. You can’t have a man who prays 5 days a day, is a great muslim and yet will be okay with you leading a Western way of life. You have to choose and desi women are unwilling to do so. Additionally in the case they are unwilling to do so they rather get a divorce if necessary to maintain their independence and belief of self. Marriage for me is a one time deal. Divorce is only applicable of she cheats. The rest can be worked out on compromise. The idea of marriage doesn’t scare me as much as marrying an indifferent difficult woman who has never had to compromise in her life but carries a chip on her shoulder because of imaginary discrimination that has never happened to her but to other women in Pakistan.

• How did the fear end and how did u end up committing? ( i know the answer:emmy: it was ur mommy joota mar you)

Have not committed yet.

• Do u really think women are churail?

Nope. But they can be difficult and uncompromising. Second question has details.

• Did all the per-commitment fears come true?

No clue not married.

All of that…pretty much sums it all up.

i think churail women a lot more in number than non-churail ones…