Can anyone shed some light what Quran says about father’s duty towards his child when father is a divorcee? If child is living with the mother, how involved a father should be in his son/daughter’s life, emotionally and financially? Lets say both sides have re-married.
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
i think (my views so dont ask for references) that the mother is responsible only for taking care of the child until the age where she has to breastfeed the child....
after that its the father's responsibility completely to take care of and provide all necessities to the child....
and i think the child stays with the father....
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
Thanks armughal. Can you or anyone else please provide some reference from Quran about this? Does Quran mentions specifically about how a child should be raised if parents are divorced?
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
Of course you would think that the child has to stay with the father. But if we are to look at this from a cultural point of view - the same culture that says a woman should stay at home because a child needs attention at home, for of course the father can’t do that while being at work, nor can a working mother do that when being at work…
How does this same culture say that a child should be raised by the father and the father only? After all, doesn’t it defeat the whole argument that someone should be at home looking after the child?
If the question is asking for an Islamic answer, then why did you have to put your own 2 cents culturally-influenced personally-influenced answer, and therefore try to subconsciencely influence anyone reading this thread?
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
^ PCG dear, a man can marry another woman and she can take care of the child or he can hire a baby-sitter.....
but if the woman aint going to work, she can hardly feed herself so what will she do for the child????
and no this is not culturally influenced....
and my views r not based on personal thinking, its based on whatever I know about the religion....
i put in the "my thinking" part to avoid ppl asking for references, which instead of me, they shud themselves be digging out to get a good excercise for future queries....
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
I can understand your feelings but Islam is hardly fair to men against women 
According to Quran, Mother is not required to breastfeed her own child if she does not wish so …
And If she agrees to do so, upon request, man (husband ) is ordered to pay her for this service along with bearing the cost of boarding and lounging during the period. Please note that this is in the case of diovorce or separation, during the time of id’dat.
See here …
The holy Quran Sura Talaq (65) verse 6
YUSUFALI: Let the women live (in 'iddat) in the same style as ye live, according to your means: Annoy them not, so as to restrict them. And if they carry (life in their wombs), then spend (your substance) on them until they deliver their burden: and if they suckle your (offspring), give them their recompense: and take mutual counsel together, according to what is just and reasonable. And if ye find yourselves in difficulties, let another woman suckle (the child) on the (father’s) behalf.
PICKTHAL: Lodge them where ye dwell, according to your wealth, and harass them not so as to straiten life for them. And if they are with child, then spend for them till they bring forth their burden. Then, if they give suck for you, give them their due payment and consult together in kindness; but if ye make difficulties for one another, then let some other woman give suck for him (the father of the child).
It is SOLE responsibility of Man to provide resources for every need of his wife/children/parents. So there is no question who will bear the expenses. Supporting a child is a responsibility of father, no matter where the child lives.
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
^ yes code-red, that makes a better point, that even those two years, if the woman does not want to feed the baby, it is the father’s resposibility…
so divorce or not divorce, the father has to cater to the needs of the kids…
and PCG thinks these r my personal views… 
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
No, I know that the father has to provide financially to the child.
The issue is where does the child live - with mom or dad. I think you're being biased by saying the child lives with the father automatically. Its pure BS. Each case is individual - you have to look at who will be the better parent and who the child is more comfortable with. I don't agree with this idea that moms are only good up until suckling, and then they have no right to their child, but the father's right comes in after the suckling stops. Utter BS.
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
^ the child stays with the father because he is responsible to provide him the shelter....
if he says "the child can stay in my house and i dont have enuff to pay for another house", then surely the woman (who is now divorced and cannot stay with the man) has to have her own house where she can keep the child....
and if she doesnt own a house, and herself shall be staying with someone else (brother or sister or whatever), where is it better for the child to stay????
in a house (his father's house) where he has all rights or in a house where he always feels he owes a debt for the owner for letting him stay there....
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
This is the reason Islam scrutinize men so much, because most women make decisions emotionally, rather taking time and thinking rationally.
Islamically, Women are “not” responsible financially for even one single soul in this world. Not even for herself !
So if so women are hell bent on doing social work then more power to them :k:
God is perfectly aware of the fact that men and women are not equal, so the resultant dirstribution of rights and responsibilities, heavily in favor of superior gender namely females.
Children are responsibility of father, after father it is grandfather of uncles( from father’s side) No matter where the child lives. In case of death of husband or divorce, woman is not (legally:Islamically) obliged to take care of her own children. So that she may not face hurdles in re-marriage anytime soon.
Man is made so much liable so that he should think about a 1000 time before taking a decision about divorce. But many women do get emotional and demand the custody of their children and also they would support the children on their own. Which is the mistake, Islam wants to save the women from.
Note that, No court can make this decision of making mother financially liable for her children(in presence of father), untill and unless she voluntarily wants to do so.
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
First you prove to me that Islam says women think emotionally and not rationally.
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
BOY: remains with mother till he is seven years old; financial responsibility is father's
GIRl: remains with mother till she reaches puberty; financial reponsibility is father's
Father takes custody afterwards.
End of thread!
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
Oh phuleeseee!!!
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
^ thank you for proving his point :)
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
You think that was emotional? There is nothing worth discussing in his post. It reeks of disrespect towards women. So woman is not responsible for her or anyone else’s upkeep. She can’t think for herself and cannot make any decisions because her brains is not good enough. He says woman is not obliged to take care of her own children and in the process woman is left without recourse if she wants to take care of her own children.
Why then does he call women “superior”? What the characteristic that is superior?
That post was utter nonsense.
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
Hm, if this is true about women, then why is the whole world such a messed up place? After all, most parts are ruled by men.
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
Helloo, Thats what “I” say. Talk to me 
And I also said and proved a number of times that Islam’s treatment of genders is heavily biased. Now just one example women have no financial obligations whatsoever, so why does quran give them shares in inheritance of father, husband and sons ? why ? . Islam is against common sense universally accepted laws of gender equality. There should be Ijtehad and women should be made equally liable financially for their off springs and other close relatives :k:
AishaA - The disrespect is only a sign of frustration which is cuased be unfair treatment of men in Islam- I hope that educated women like yourself and pcg will make this pledge to share the burden of responsibilities equally with you male counterpart and become the beacon of light for those women who are still strangled in the out dated principles of Islam. It is right time for this rational decision :k:
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
Dude, take a deep breath and look around you. Do you find the plight of women in the South East Asia enviable? Decision making gives you responsibilities… take away responsibilities and you take away decision making.
Islam may treat men unfairly but in your society it is definitely the women who suffer.
Re: Father’s reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
I take many deep breaths when ladies ask me to lift heavy weights and take them upstairs … I can not refuse, because they say I am strong, I can not ask them to share the burden becuase they would ask, am I not a man enough ? I can not even complain because I am a south east asian Man, which is not programed to complain.
See, Men are incapable of complaining. Have you ever heard how many men are killed just because they ask share in inheritance ? These type of killings take place everyday, just noone takes notice , no one bothers just it is man, men can be killed there is nothing strange . A Man is killed so what ?? If there was a women then it is a hot issue :k:
Ever heard of bloody so called honor killing in Pakistan and other countries, Let me give you some boring news… In honor killing a "Man is also killed by rival famillies along with a women " … yet the world only cares about women who are killed, no cares about those men who are killed, like men are not worth more than a house fly. NGO’s would feel embarrased if they take up the issue of men !
Listen carefuly ! This world is not fair to weak and poor MEN and WOMEN. Both are treated equally Bad. You don’t care about men becuase you have no interest in their plight + Men are not programed to complain
Plus, women are supperior becuase they came brainwash men easily, Men on the other hand are dumb, they even can not understand women.
Re: Father's reponsibility with child when parents are divorced?
Code-Red, you are a woman trapped in a man's body.
Complain, complain, complain...