Re: False traditions / understanding of relationships
A wife should be happy to help care for her husband's parents, but there should be a balance. I have seen too many families who expect that the wife do all of the housework, care for the parents, raise the kids, and wait hand and foot on everyone in the house. If the husband expects his wife to do everything in the home, then he needs to provide her with the help and resources to do so, and not treat her like a glorified servant. If the in-laws are in need of medical care, then he also should hire an in-home healthcare worker to come occasionally and provide some of the care. If he has younger brothers and sisters at home, then they need to provide the bulk of the care, even if they are in school, particularly if the wife is also raising children.
I think that a husband has to show an equal willingness to help his wife care for her parents. He should be willing to bring them into his home, pay any necessary costs, and help his wife to care for them if needed.
Above all, he should respect his wife for the care that she provides, and not treat it as an expectation or her "farz".