Facebook Invitation....

[Bobby1]

Re: Facebook Invitation…

@Illuminate

When we were younger we’d always complain about people showing up to our home with nothing. It was really childish. My parents always made an effort to buy things or made dishes when going over to people’s houses and over time we’ve learned that not only is it the right thing to do, it’s something that’s done from the heart and not everyone has the hidayah (guidance) to give and do good for others. Good on you to give to your nephew and other members of the family. The good you do now will come back in another form iA. And some people have a different way of giving back, it doesn’t always have to be material gifts.

I guess with the newer generation a FB invite or online invitation is the norm. I’ve only received one printed wedding card. They’re being phased out. Most people don’t have the desire/etiquette to call people up. I am probably really old school but whenever it’s a special event (ie. Eid, special announcement, etc) I make it priority to personally call people I am close to. I think it’s really important to connect via phone or in person as it really strengthens relationships and that sense of ‘community’ and ‘family’ that we’re losing out on. I don’t hold it against people. They do what they think it best and we just have to accept it and join in their festivities, and if you don’t have similar feelings then you can always opt out and wish them/ make dua for them from a far.

Thanks for your input, you are such an awesome young lady. My wife called him and I guess he was a little hurt because I called his younger brother out when he came to visit from Houston, his younger brother does not have a good sense of direction and jumps from one thing to another without really finding a career. I felt that the younger brother was always ridiculing his mother on fb for being simple. His mother bought him a car, she financially supports him also. I told the younger brother if he is so smart than how come his simple mom is financially independent and he is the one taking help from her. This upset him a lot and there was an argument and he cried a lot. I did apologize for making him feel bad. later his mom thanked me, she was saying that he used to be rude to her and now talks properly to her. I even call my kids out on BS. Sometimes tough love is needed. My wife has a nice way of talking and told him that if the relationship is important to him then we will come and if not then that is fine also and he said that it was important to him. Divorces screw kids life so I have to lower my expectations for him.

You are completely right, you have to do stuff for people and it gets back to you. We took a Pakistani family on a great vacation to give our kids company and right after these people yelled at my wife rather than be appreciative and just recently my daughters best friend and her mom took her for an all inclusive 5 star resort vacation to Mexico without asking her for a penny. Mom finally received her divorce settlement and back charges.