The following are all answers written by children taking exams…
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“When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire.”
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“H3O is hot water, and CO3 is cold water”
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“To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube”
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“When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide”
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“Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state”
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“Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars.”
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“Blood flows down one leg and up the other.”
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“Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then expectoration.”
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“The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader.”
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“Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.”
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“A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.”
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“Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.”
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“The pistol of a flower is its only protections agenst insects.”
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“The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana.”
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“A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors.”
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“The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in his fight.”
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“A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.”
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“Many women belive that an alcoholic binge will have no ill effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a large misconception.”
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“Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa.”
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“Germinate: To become a naturalized German.”
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“Liter: A nest of young puppies.”
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“Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat.”
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“Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.”
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“Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky.”
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“Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot.”
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“Vacumm: A large, empty space where the pope lives.”
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“Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative.”
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“To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.”
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“For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart stops.”
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“For dog bite: put the dog away for sevral days. If he has not recovered, then kill it.”
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“For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead.”
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“For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose untill it drops in your throat.”
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“To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow.”
:k:
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