Evil within...

Lifestyle Relationships
1

Throughout life people take part in many things. Some of these things may be in the nature of man. Some are those that we may wish we never took part in yet we continue to do so whether we recognize it or not. This is a short list of things i have practised, to my own dismay:

Hypocracy, backbiting, jealousy, envy, hate, lust, egoism, being judgemental, disapprobation, vulgarity, arrogance, suspicion, slander, misconduct, prejudice…and the list goes on.

I digress. Knowing that I have partaken in these things leaves a certain amount of guilt. How do you settle with yourself knowing that some of these things you may practise over and over again? I try to catch myself at times when I feel I am doing something I should not, but sometimes its just that…a hesitation…and I continue with it. Why do we do that? Knowingly participate in harmful things?
You tell yourself that you will try to be careful with what you do and say and yet you constantly stumble. Hurting not only yourself but those around you. You want forgiveness but where to seek it? Within yourself, from others, from the Almighty? You want perfection yet it eludes you. Some comfort comes in the realization that this is not heaven, but earth. A place where mistakes are to be made and forgiven. Which is harder, forgiving yourself or someone else?

sigh I’m in a weird mood. I apologize if I dont make any sense.

Can you be a good person with all the ‘evil’ that exists within?

Learn to love yourself, then learn to love one-another

[This message has been edited by Munni (edited February 03, 2002).]

2

Yes, I believe you can be a good person with all the evil that exists within and around you. No one is an exception to evil, it gets the best of us. Take the line of Prophets and Sahaba's; at times they have committed evil.

i.e. take the Prophet who got swalloed by the fish, he sinned by disobeying the Almighty.

Jitna Diya Sarkar Nay Mujko, Itni Meri Auqat Nahi, Yeh Saab Tumhara Karam Hai Aqa, Mujh Mein Aisi Koi Baat Nahin.

Courage is not the absence of fear but it is the will to go on.

3

Munni dear,

That's a pretty long list. I'd keep it short, that helps too.

Personally I think honesty and modesty are the greatest virtues of them all and jealousy the worst evil. Everything else kinda branches out of the above. But that's just my opinion, it's a pretty subjective matter to begin with - and quite introversive as well.

[This message has been edited by Roman (edited February 03, 2002).]

4

Munni, you are absolutely making a lot of sense with this topic of yours. Looking into our own selves can really scare us sometimes; you know, the bad things we are all capable of doing. In my opinion, all of the things that you have mentioned arise from our egoism (as called in Urdu the "mein" of a person, mein as in me, me and only me) and consequently from our selfishness. We all want to nurture and care for ourselves in the best possible way and this is what makes us stumble constantly.

The problem is, we are all the same. A lot of times, we are able to find excuses for our wrongful acts by looking at what other people do. Since none of us sets a good example, the cycle just continues.

In my case, like you, the guilt is there. And it makes me dislike myself more and more everyday. Perfection can never be achieved though it would be such a nice thing to have. Imagine a heart devoid of all things bad. Absolutely beautiful!

So what you wanted to See good has made you blind
And what you wanted to Be yours has made it Mine
So don't you lock up Something that you
Wanted to see fly
Hands are for shaking No not tying
I sure don't Mind a change But I fell on black Days
How would I know That this could be My fate

[This message has been edited by Scratch (edited February 03, 2002).]

5

we are all evil munni. no matter how hard u try i am pretty sure that every one finds "evil things" alluring. Its a lot easier to forgive other ppl than to forgive ur self. I hate my self again and agian for all the things i have done since my childhood cant run away from the 'sins'

sin---denial---acceptance--- self-damnation

6

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7

dp agrees with Roman,

8

You know u're totally messed up when Sarah's giving you pep talk!

This Space For Rent

9

If they ever stop writing songs our host 'angsty' aunt is gonna be struck dumb.

10

Thanks all for your replies, keep them coming. It is a comfort to read them.

I'm no longer in that 'weird' mood, but these thoughts creep into the mind every now and then. Something you cant necessarily 'escape'. sigh

CocoNut,
Indeed, nobody is the exception.

Roman,
Yes its best to keep the list as short as possible, but sometimes you dont realize you're doing it, and only figure it out in hindsight.

Scratch,
Try not to dislike yourself but rather try to limit the qualities/actions that you dont like. We are all selfish in our own ways, but we are also giving and kind. Best to try and balance, which is easier said than done! Keep in mind this is earth, not heaven, as much as we'd like for this to be heaven, its not.

Gamma,
Yes, the bad or evil things are surrounded or full of pleasure it seems! In the end you hurt your own soul for following such things. Not worth it in the longrun. sigh

Sarah,
Thank you for the long reply, infact I enjoy reading long replies, so dont ever feel your words are being wasted. Didnt mean to make you or anyone else feel bad. sigh
I dont believe I have heard the song you mentioned. I know other songs of theirs, interesting lyrics. Tomorrow will be okay, I have hope for that day...

I agree that its important you realize you've made a mistake, it helps you grow. Its also a reminder that you're human.

That is sooooooooo true, you dont always intentionally do the harm. Yes, I have felt bad while I'm doing what I know isnt right, and even when others are doing it and I just keep going along listening. It's like, whats wrong with me? Why dont I speak up or stop myself?

Defining what people do is a difficult thing. What is evil, etc, thats a whole other topic which I wont get into right now. smile

Intentions are important yes, and they do affect the interpretation of every action, but I believe we are rsponsible for our actions even if we didnt intend them. Okay did that make any sense? grin

I take comfort in that Allah is Merciful and recognizes that we falter, and I believe that we are meant to falter because if we didnt, then maybe we wouldnt look towards Allah. Thank Allah for that!

Yes I have heard the Beatles song. I'll have to look for it! grin

I try to do something good to make up for the bad I've done. I believe that good deeds erase bad ones. I read that when you do something bad to another its good to ask for blessings for that person. It's a way of repenting for your sin.

Finally, thank you for the comforting thoughts. You're a doll!

Thank you all!

smile

Learn to love yourself, then learn to love one-another

11

Isnt that what life is all about, knowing your drawbacks, yet still making the best of the good that you embody?

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Munni, you shouldn’t have said you like long posts. You’re going to regret it when you end up having to sift though pages and pages of my mindless banter.

Glad to see you’re feeling better.

PA and Thap, if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all huh.

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/smile.gif

(sticks tongue out)

Thap, thumbs up on the anti-kasoti effort. Too bad you guys couldn’t wing it with the females of GS. Maybe PA should pay greater attention to your fly and it’s opened/unopened state. We wouldn’t want to scare everybody away now would we?

You’re my girl
And that’s all right
If you sting me
I won’t mind

  • Deftones
13

How do you make things better?
One hopes that you live and learn.
observe, listen, think. Life is great teacher. All of us have done things we aren't proud of. What counts is whether we repeat our mistakes.

It's question of constantly finding a balance in an ever changing situation with people who are all different.

The thing goes two ways. It's not just that we hurt people, intentionally or not, we also tend to get upset and hurt about things that aren't meant necessarily to hurt us, just that the person didn't know that we could take it badly.

When you are hurt think why and make a point not to repeat it in your dealings with others. Part of respect towards others is being honest even in a situation where you know there is potential to be misunderstood.

When you are angry, jealous or resentful, you message can come over badly. So try and be at peace with yourself and the world, speak to the other person with love in your heart and even the hardest message will not be misunderstood. Niyat aur dil ka haal dekhiye. And pardon yourself, just as you pardon those who have hurt you.