Eurgh im actually quite insecure sometimes.

[redvelvet]

Re: Eurgh im actually quite insecure sometimes.

@inspiron

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1. What if he thinks im ugly/fat/ogre looking/not as pretty as he remembers

2. What if he hates me

3. Even worse what if he hates me and I really like him…then ill be really sad

4. What if like we dont talk

(

1. He’s met you in person before, so if you found you THAT hideous…it would not have progressed to the stage that it’s at now.

2. Hate’s a rather strong word. People don’t even pursue rishtas that they “dislike”…let alone “hate.” So, he doesn’t hate you…if things have come this far. During your date…there’s a possibility that he might feel you two aren’t so compatible or he might not like a particular aspect of your personality…but even that is not on the same level as “hate”. Again, it’s a strong word. Besides…let’s say that he did “hate” you…you’re too smart to waste your time on a guy who is doesn’t reciprocate.

3. It’s natural to be sad when your feelings are not returned, but that’s a part of life. You will move on from him because you haven’t invested that much emotional energy in him in the first place. Just see this date as an opportunity to “get to know him better” as opposed to determinining whether you’re going to love him. Maybe that might ease the tension.

4. Some amount of talking WILL take place. It may start off slow and awkward…but it will progress. You do know this guy…you know what he does…you know his family. You can ask him open ended questions about these things…he’ll answer them…he’ll reciprocate with the asking…and a conversation will happen.

You seem more worried about what kind of an impression you’ll make on him. You’re so worried about his approval…but …what if YOU don’t find him attractive or funny or interesting? Don’t your own thoughts matter? It’s not only his criteria that you have to meet, right? What about your own? You’re not in “love” with him at this stage, Inspiron. You’re just getting to know him better.

If you both just don’t “click”…then that’s something you should find out BEFORE hand as opposed to after an engagement/wedding. If things don’t work out…then this date could be something that saves you from greater heartache down the road.

Have you ever come across people in school/at work/at social settings…that you think are nice…but you don’t find that compatible, so the relationship doesn’t develop further. You don’t necessarily “hate” them…it’s jus that there’s a lack of similarity/chemistry. Sometimes a person (male or female) may feel that way about you…sometimes you may feel that way about them. It’s part of life. Just relax…and have fun.