Alot of male bashing threads have been an essential part of Life 1 and I want to change that today. I want to talk about parents trying to find a rishta for their sons 
THis is long so bear with me.
So my parents have been thinking of I am of marriageable age for quite some time now. You know how parents are always in a hurry? BUt I was away for work and their dream of making me meet other rishtas and their families remained a dream until recently.
They heard of a rishta through a close family friend.We spoke over the phone etc. I thought he was okay, talked to his family seemed pretty nice. They wanted to come over (from NJ to Chicago) but since i was away ,it kept getting delayed. Meanwhile his parents wanted my parents to say yes, without even meeting me. Finally we meet and guess waht: His mother says the girl has pimples and says no to the rishta. 
I am telling you, i have never heard of anyone getting rejected becuz of occasional breakouts 
And the whole time they were visiting, I could feel his mom looking at my hands, feet, face etc.
So, my parents hear abt another guy and they meet him, really really like him. Bara suljha hua larka hai etc etc. His parents are in Pak and he tells them about my potential risha. Once they found out that I used to work for the military, they think I am OVEReducated (which I am NOT at all, and a lot of ppl on GS can confirm that :D). THey get all scared thinking he is gonna marry me or something so they want him to come home immediately and leave his studies behind.
Now I am like what the heck??First of all, its the dude whos gonna spend his life with me (well his parents too, but still, he is the main person). And then second, do these days guys not have any clue waht they want??Their parents decide everything for them?Sorry, i dont really mean to bash men today (thats for later 
)
I just wanted to share these very pathetic expriences of mine.Other guppans/guppies are welcome to share thiers too.
its like ur marrying the bloody family not the guy!!!
one of the excuses i heard was that the girl is too honest..the mum of the guy asks me a questioni give my answer and its not what she wnats to hear!! and im meant to lie???? wot the frig!!!
so the next time i try not to speak..then all of a sudden im stuck up!!!
its a hard life!! just take these as experiances and learn from them..u gotta go thru bad things to get to the good stuff (that sounds so pathetic..but its friday..im tired!!)
This guy I know got rejected because during the first visit he peeled the whole banana at once and started eating it. The girl said it was too paindoo-ish.
and uncivilised!
aww bless..was that guy u by any chance? :p
No, I eat my bananas with fork and a knife.
Re: Enough of male bashing threads…
Did you ask her how she’s still married with all those wrinkles on her face? Then turn over to the uncle and say “Shame on you!”.
anyway, how can anyone be OVER-educated? The more educated the better. If nothing else, they can at least look at it from their own shallow point of view that the kids will grow up in a well-educated gharaana. Or maybe it’s a ‘family’ thing to remain jahil.
Now that would be considered paindoo etiquette..
Ira, do you really think this cannot be turned into a male bashing thread? I can find many ways but will leave it alone … for now. 
I did have one guy once indirectly tell me that ‘nice’ Pakistani girls are supposed to be petite, light-skinned and Bollywoodish (as in Diya Mirza or Aishwariya like) as well as … well less intimidating. I clearly do not fit the profile.
Parental rejections … usually are quite lame … as in I’m not a ‘professional’ and they want a doctorni daughter-in-law … oooh yeah, I’ve also been told I don’t come from ‘money’ and my parents are not rich and we don’t drive Mercedes or BMWs and therefore, we are not worthy. Afterwards, the guy’s mother and father apologised but it was too late.
I find it really annoying when people ask my family background, like what my uncles all do for a living and what my grandfathers both did for a living. My grandfathers have both passed away … quite a while back. I don’t see the relevance in insisting in knowing what they did for a living when they were alive and how much education they had, and the rest of my extended family is really none of their business. 
r these people for real? maybe this is why hell was created!! Okay i kno, no need to judge, but they started 
well my share, one guy said i was too paki for him. I wore a shalwar kameez instead of a friggin bikini that i was suppose to parade myself in holdin chai ofcourse.
N well i kinda said no to a guy cuz he was kinda saorta wearing blush n surma. See a guy who does more makeup than me.. nah uh… so i guess i belong in some kinda hell to now .. dont I for nitpicking? 
Hmm well I get the "over educated" part coz it's a case in my family, whereby 2 of my aunts have PhDs and their husbands are barely graduates, both husbands make that an issue everytime there's a decision to be made like "ohh you shut up just coz you went to college for more years doesn't mean..blah blah"
And worse still if the lady happens to get paid more than her husband, it becomes rather degrading then... I've even had a case in my family where one of my aunts got a lot of money when her old aunt passed away and she started "bossing" over the hubby. Not sayin all women with money, power and education are bossy but men feel insecure and tend to be overdominating when they feel like their status in the family is threathened, and if a woman is powerful enough she might just step up to the plate and give the hubby back a earful herself.
I usually tell them my great grandpa invaded Afghanistan. I give them some made up Afghani name too like Ali Hamid Abadali or Khush-haal Khan Durrani and they believe me. They believe me in fear of showing their lack of history. The names sound familiar to them so they have to go along with my story.
It's interesting that once two MIL to be were fighting over who my perdaada was. One thought he invaded Afghanistan and the other believed he was a Mongol.
are you serious FG? about the MIL part?
Naaa. I am yet to go through this weird and unique experience of rishta hunting. But I would definitely suggest this to anyone who is confronted with ancestral interrogation.
All because of you people I laughed so hard I spilled hot chai on myself.Anyway Ira meri jaan I told you you're a lot better of knowing those stupid guys werent worth it.InshAllah you'll find some decent guy who comes from a decent family.Dont feel bad about those, see it as an education about ignorant people.
Mehnaz--- Urghhh.Somebody dared to say something like that to you.He/they were obviously out of their minds.I mean I cant imagine why they would possibly say something so stupid to you- you're absolutely beautiful.
As for myself I cant recall any rishtha rejections,I'll let you guys know in a few years.I havent gotten many to start with , usually we say I still need to get my degrees first.Then we'll see.But some of my friends have met some really stupid people.One guy rejected a friend of mine ,why? because her hair was too short.Sheesh.
i’ve told my parents to start looking for rishtas for me, and my mom won’t look now until i lose weight, coz she says ill be rejected in two seconds flat 
Sara..you’re so innocently cute. You are too young to be thinking of shaadi waadi.
well better than my mom starving me the day before some rishta is coming over..as if it’ll make a difference
Sara its not like guys arent fat.( btw I dont think you should worry too mcuh about your weight.you're fine.)
LK-- dont be silly next time.You dont want him to hear your tummy growling.