I have been looking at many engagement photo shoots nowadays. Haven’t seen them with locally based couples but couples based abroad are having them and usually have no problems hugging or showing affection. To me a lot of these poses seem odd before the nikkah but I think it is a love v/s arranged marriage thing. With all the photojournalism going around, I don’t think that this style would catch up here locally. Am I just being rigid/conservative here? Do you think this has a place in an arranged marriage setup?
Why is this kind engagement photo shoot important?
^ Now that is a bit odd for arranged marriage.. I dont think its important, and not many people do such engagement shoots. But if its a love marriage then its understandable.
mahi i don't think you're being rigid or conservative. I honestly don't see the point in these photo shoots before marriage (Unless its specifically for an engagement). no offense to anyone, but it just looks really fake to me.
I agree with Mahismart and Sara516, can't really see 'engagement photography' taking off in my neck of the woods.... to be honest I hadn't even heard of it until I read this thread! Bit too 'forward' before the nikkah imo.
Fake, Sara?!? but these are real couples about to wed? Just can’t swallow the poses but how do they seem fake to you?
An engagement session at Montage Laguna Beach (www.montagelagunabeach.com). The shoot happened the end of October 2009 and the bride and groom are to be married January 01, 2010.
This is a bit much. Actually it’s waaaaay too much! I’ve been to weddings where the couples show picture slideshows and share their “lovestory” with the guests and I’ve noticed that for the most part the guests are uncomfortable when a couple overshares their private moments.
Sharing a little bit is okay, but this is OTT unless you’re part of a very modern or forward-thinking community or social circle. The moderates and conservatives that I know would not approve of this.
Personally i think a photoshoot for a mere engagement is too much. I’d rather save all that for my actual wedding. No one really needs a playbyplay of your entire relationship timeline anyway.
However if you have to have one, I’d go for something like ‘Aishah & Adnan’s’.. I thought it was actually kind of sweet/tasteful.
i dont know what the big debate is about. i love playful shoots engagement or wedding; i think they're great. ive seen a lot of shoots done in pakistan with couples in semi-intimate poses like this i think its awesome... what do you want instead? a bride sitting by herself on the bed?
even people that have arranged marraiges come to somewhat know each other before the wedding and end up having photoshoots like these, i personally dont see anything wrong with it. im happy for the couples that do what they want to instead of getting shot down like this.
I do not think you are being too rigid/conservative at all Mahi. I think doing an engagement shoot is bases on personal preference and the 2 families ideals and values. They are becoming more and more common here in the states with the love-marriage couples… because they see american western couples do this (as it is in their culture) and are adopting it as well. In america, almost every gora couple I know has had an engagement shoot…they usually use a pic or a couple pics later on when they send “Save the Dates”. It makes sense for them to do a shoot since they dont have actual engagement functions or ceremonies of any sort that are captured on film. So whatever. But just like other customs that have been adopted … such as bride holding a bouquet, having “bridesmaids”, giving out wedding favors, the whole engagement ring itself, etc… this is just another one to add to the list that some Pakistani love marriage couples are taking upon.
Because it is already part of the american “culture” here… that is why its being done… i don’t see it becoming common in Pakistan for some time now… if ever.
The style of these shoots are too forward in my opinion… I am having a love marriage but I know exactly how my family is… shoots like this would not fly. :nono: So I guess even here.. it depends on one’s family cultural thinking ..even if you having a luv marriage.
Completely agree… its too much and might be something they want JUST FOR THEMSELVES … but definitely should not be shown to others. At weddings …its inappropriate.
I have been to weddings where slideshows are quite cute where they have pics of the couple as kids growing up. That is sweet. Lots of family pics… and the only “couple pics” are also posed pics are engagement pics… and proper pics of them (usually with their families at functions) after the engagement. If they had a nikkah before, a pic or two is included of that as well. That sort of “love story” slideshow is fine in my opinion.
A slideshow showcasing one’s “legit” love story is too much… and can be very awkward for guests. One of my best friends dad was telling us a story that they went to a wedding recently where there was one of these kind of slideshows… there were pics of the couple in the pajamas and other inappropriate type of pics. Uncle was absolutely horrified and made a big point saying how incredibly inappropriate and wrong it was for this sort of slideshow with these kind of pics to be shown. This uncle himself is EXTREMELY MODERN… probably the one of the most westernized and modern uncles I know…super easy going. So u know its bad when he is calling someone out on something. He said that there are certain “moments” that should be kept private… and there is no point of sharing them with every single guest at your wedding. He and auntie both felt really uncomfortable. So even with modern and forward thinking communities I think… they wouldn’t be a fan of this… it just isn’t classy. Not the time or place…
hmm.. interesting.. I have never heard of such engagement shoots. By the way, I am a European gori. Must be an American thing. Personally, I do not like it. Why should you share such intimate poses of you and your beloved with everybody else??
Mahi, I wouldn't call you "rigid" for having your opinion but I think this is quite common in Pakistan. Alot of my friends had these kind of shoots done for engagment and wedding shoots prior to nikah. It's not uncommon at all.
He said that there are certain “moments” that should be kept private… and there is no point of sharing them with every single guest at your wedding. He and auntie both felt really uncomfortable. So even with modern and forward thinking communities I think… they wouldn’t be a fan of this… it just isn’t classy. Not the time or place…