Times have changed, society has changed, people have changed, laws have changed and what worked for my parents doesn’t work for me. What works for me doesnt work for my parents. With a 50 percent divorce rate amongst muslims in USA and maybe a lot of unhappy marriages this thing seems broken. I have seen posters here who were miserable in their marriage from day 1. Always look ahead and not behind. I raised my kids to navigate the changes in society. I wish we had the same values as your grandparents but we don’t anymore.