I’m sure some of you have been in this situation before, which is why I want some advice. I wanna encourage my younger brother (he’s 17) to pray. I live away from home for school, but when I come home I have to ask him to pray and literally stand on his head until he does-which saddens me and I wish he was better. Also, he prays only because I wouldn’t leave him alone until he does otherwise he wouldn’t, which is again-pretty saddening. I guess some of it is also because my dad and older sister, who stay at home with him, don’t pray at all (I don’t know what’s the deal but my mum has tried numerous times, they just won’t- I would LOVE for my sister to start again too, she used to be punctual but then stopped).
Since he’s much younger, I want him to get into this praying habit, but I don’t know how to effectively do this. I’m usually only home for 15 or so days between semesters, and he does not listen to my mom very much. Any advice?
PS- I would appreciate if all of you naik log will make dua for him, JazakAllah khair!
i understand full well what u r saying...believe me, there isn't any quick fix. u can only encourage him to do that by praying urself out in the open so he sees it and ur father and sister as well. sometimes, praying in the living room or announcing the prayer time will be a good reminder. u keep doping it and keep asking. i think u must talk to ur sis and dad about that. he has an obligation to make sure that his kids pray...he has authority to enforce if the kids are minor. i'll pray for all of us iA...aameen
^thanks for replying. That's how my mom did it too, she'd come to our room to pray even for Fajr- I remember. Even now she prays in the living room, I usually pray in his room or mine but it doesn't seem to affect him very much. He'll just ignore it :(
I think it will have an affect on him later on in life. Slowly his conscience will prick him... Thats how it worked out in our household.. Can i just say by you standing on his head to make sure he prays may have adverse affects. Sometimes a person rebels if they are being forced to do something they dont want to. Your obligation is to tell him once, if he doesnt then islamically he's baligh and accountable for his own actions after all you wont be there to make sure he prays forever. Give him some space and try a lighter approach, in the mean time the best thing you can do for him is make dua in your own prayers. I have strong faith that allah listens to the dua's of a person who prays 5times a day when they ask for guidance for family members. Allah will bring barkat into your home by a means of your prayers inshallah
^Thanks lama, that's the reason I came here. I don't like policing him and I'm pretty sure he'd rebel and not pray at all when I leave. I got into regular praying later than I had wanted to, but I kinda regret it now and wish I had started earlier- which is precisely why I want him to start now, and not have to go through this regret but I guess all I can do is pray and let him learn on his own.
I totally understand where your coming from! For me...if I were to nag my brother...he would pray...but it wouldn't be from the heart and it was like he were doing it for me and not for Allah (swt)...so now I just remind him.."oh It's namaz time", I'm going to pray...and we also have an athan alarm clock, which is another constant reminder...and he sees us praying and now Mashallah he has joined in as well!
^you know Malika- that's a good idea, we don't have those athaan clocks but I'll put the Islamicfinder Athaan thing on my notebook. If nothing else, we'll have athaan in our house! JazakAllah khair! :)
I remember when I was growing up, for me namaz was often boring, because I didn’t know the meaning of the words we said during prayer, it just became saying unknown words. I obeyed however and liked to learn everything, because I knew it was important in Islam, yet it wasn’t very interesting.
So I’m teaching my daughter now the meaning of the words we say during namaz. That makes a lot of difference. When you understand what exactly you say during namaz, your heart is more in it. You realise better how important it is and since it becomes more interesting when you understand the meaning, you are more likely to pray. And if you choose a different surat for each rakat, it also helps to pay more attention to namaz itself, instead of your thoughts moving away to what you were doing or what you’re going to do after namaz.
Maybe he can first do a few namazay during the day, so he can get used to doing namaz. Then slowly start praying 5 times a day. He’ll think, if I did assar namaz or maghrib, I might as well do fadjr and the rest too.
Try to make it more interesting, knowing what you do, understanding what it means, helps a lot. Give him a book which explaines the meaning of the words you say during namaz, or give him just a paper where you’ve written the meaning of the words, anything to make it easier and more likeable for him to start learning the meaning and becoming more interested in namaz.
Here is one example of a link which can easily be printed:
I personally prefer a translation which explains it word by word. So you don’t just understand the sentence, but each word in the sentence. Many Urdu translations can provide those.