Christmas and New years always bring out the truth from some people…one of my friends told me she was lesbian and now heres another friend who quite frankly i dont know how to advise simply becuase im struggling to realise whether they actually have a problem or not…
They told me they are emotionless…he kind of feels heartless cos nothing seems to bother him or upset him but then things dont seem to make him happy either…infact his worry is that he doesnt worry…
His aunt died last week and although he didnt know her too well he said he felt nothing…whether things work or dont work out with chicks he meets it doesnt bother him…he has never felt anything for anyone hes met…
He said he came across a little girl who had a horrible story…her mum had AIDs and she was born positive…living to die basically…she was eight years old and in his head he said i should be getting upset but he said two minutes later he was laughing and joking with his friends…these are a sample of things he said…
Hes extremely independent in that he doesnt need people and can cope by himself…in someways thats enviable in that he lives stress free or so it seems and doesnt worry…theres something quite impressive to me about people who have no emotion but at the same time its a shame that he doesnt have feelings of love for anyone…
Not sure to do because im not sure if its actually a problem or even something that will last but anyone care to offer an explanation or any advice on this persons circumstance?..
Re: Emotionless...
maybe he's got a subconscious block preventing him from "feeling"? it also sounds like a lack of empathy...
you say he's really independent and so maybe thats how he copes with the loneliness of being on his own by switching off his emotions so he doesn't have to feel them? i mean, its hard to always be independent and not have anyone to rely on or share things with, to be close with and trust. independence isn't always the great thing its cracked up to be! does he have parents? a family? what is his home life like?
but it doesn't make him weird especially since he's conscious something is missing. perhaps he should talk to a professional about it and see whats behind it?
Re: Emotionless...
I once read up on this type of behavior in my mental health class. It sounds like a case of alexithymia where a person has trouble expressing his feelings or even being able to perceive other peoples feelings... he's probably rational to a fault, where he can focus on the physical world without attaching any emotional meaning. This could be due to a number of reasons: a traumatic experience (usually in childhood) due to which he's just turned cold... so his rationale is: feel nothing, stress over nothing, and so he's eliminating all chances of feeling negative emotions such as anger, disappointment, sadness, failure, etc. Alot of times when people go through something terrible in life, they develop a hard core in themselves, they build walls around themselves so as not to let anyone in and cause damage to them again. Also, it could be depression, it could be a direct outcome of substance use dependence, etc.
I would recommend him to go speak to a counselor or a therapist of some sort.
Re: Emotionless...
Somegroovychick and Sabriya...
Interesting points...im tight with the guy but i do sense that he would have no problem if i wasnt around...he wasnt like this before but he did fall out with his secondary school friends...a couple of which he was pretty close to...like one of his freinds he knew way before me and they stopped talking this year...hes had other friends aswell that hes either drifted from or just stopped seeing...hes a social guy he just seems very closed these days a lot more than he used to be...he actually said he sees everyone as dispensable and that he doesnt care for anybody...he still has friends though and quite a few of them...homelife seems similar to mine...hes got a mum whos good to him...
He used to be more dependent and more emotionally involved with things and in some ways im quite envious of his blahzayness about things but his thing of not feeling anything when he met a aids victim or when his aunt died just seems a bit heartless to me and thats why his attitude is a bit concerning to me...he probably has developed this block but does he need to change it?...lol what a funny week...a friend who has no heart and a muslim girl revealing shes a lesbian...nice start to 2008...