Hi guys. I’ve had bulimia/ binge eating for almost my whole life. Since I was 13 and I’m now in my thirties. Very sad and pathetic. I’ve sought help, seen psychologists, read self help books and gone on many diets to shift baby weight. My binge eating is quite bad and every day my headspace is filled with new methods and strategies to use to help myself. NOTHING HELPS .
A little background, I have 2 kids, as supportive husband , I’m a practising Muslim and have issues with my mother. Very narcissistic and abusive- actually both parents were, physical and emotional. Alhumdullilah I’m happy in my life now apart from my binge eating which I can’t control. It’s like I’m a zombie and I have to eat, I don’t want to but I’m completely zoned out and I’m petrified I’m gonna gain weight so I vomit or over exercise.
Some days I feel I’m gonna die living this way. I have everything ️alhumdullilah so why am I so messed up. I’ve seen psychologists and they didn’t help.
When I was In senior high I told the school nurse and would consult with her weekly. She was lovely and tried to get me support as I desperately wanted to get better. She encouraged me to speak to my mother, which I did. She told me she knew I would vomit and said nothing else. I was so humiliated and embarrassed. I never spoke to her about it again.
Recently I’ve been wondering what the Islamic perspective of healing from an eating disorder can be. I believe Allah has a cute for all ailments but I’ve searched and don’t know how I can get better.
Recently I’ve been contemplating gargling bleach or sulphur acid just to damage my throat so I won’t be able to eat. That’s how desperate I am.
But how can I as a Muslim do that. Any advice I’m desperate and don’t want to live like this.
My previous user name was Babybird incase you want to get an insight into my life growing up - abusive family issues to better understand the situation.
Hi guys. I've had bulimia/ binge eating for almost my whole life. Since I was 13 and I'm now in my thirties. Very sad and pathetic. I've sought help, seen pacy hologram, read self help books and gone on many diets to shift baby weight. My binge eating is quite bad and every day my headspace is filled with new methods and strategies to use to help myslef. NOTHING HELPS .
A little background, I have 2 kids, as supportive husband , I'm a practising Muslim and have issues with my mother. Very narcissistic and abusive- actually both parents were, physical and emotional. Alhumdullilah I'm happy in my life now apart from my binge eating which I can't control. It's like I'm a zombie and I have to eat, I don't want to but I'm completely zoned out and I'm petrified I'm gonna gain weight so I vomit or over exercise.
Some days I feel I'm gonna die loving this way. I have everything ️alhumdullilah so why am I so messed up. I've seen psychologist and they didint help.
When I was In senior high I told the school nurse and would consult with her weekly. She was lovely and tried to get me support as I desperately wanted to get better. She encouraged me to speak to my mother, which I did. She told me she knew I would make myslef vomit and said nothing else. I was so humiliated and embarrassed. I never spoke to her about it again.
Recently I've been wondering what the Islamic perspective of healing from an eating disorder can be. I believe Allah has a cute for all ailments but I've searched and don't know how I can get better.
Recently I've been contemplating gargling bleach or sulphur acid just to damage my throat so I won't be able to eat. That's how desperate I am.
But how can I as a Muslim do that. Any advice I'm desperate and don't want to live like this.
I used to binge eat every once in a while then we got rid of all junk food in the house. There is no cake, no cookies, no chips. All we have is fruits and vegetables and meat. I tried bringing on cauliflower and didn't work that well. If you have a supportive husband then go thru the pantry and fridge and throw everything out. My ex had a mother like yours and the psychologist told her to emotionally and mentally divorce her. I know focus on my children and they are the reason for living. You need to look at that blessing and look at yourself and remind yourself of the love you owe to them and the duty you owe to them.
Bobby1- Thanks For your reply. Ur advice on removing all foods I binge on is not something I have used.
I guess I justify not doing this as my older child or husband may like a small snack of cookies or chocolate spread on toast.
I did suggest it to hubby once and he said to binge on fruit - if only it was that easy. He advised not to remove all junk. I buy occasional snacks for them but I eat them even though I dont enjoy the taste.
We r in the process of a kitchen refurbishment and the entire kitchen is getting replaced and the cupboards will be emptied. So you know what, what harm can it do? I haven't tried this so I will. After all when I get emotionally stressed and I go into zombie mode ready to binge on rubbish, If there's nothing to binge on I can't. I can't leave my kids at home to go to the local store to buy sweets.
If I manage to control the binge for approx 10 minutes the urge passes and I don't binge. But this is a rare occurrence these days.
Thanks for the advice. Psychologists often recommend distraction techniques that have never worked for me.
Recently I've been contemplating gargling bleach or sulphur acid just to damage my throat so I won't be able to eat. That's how desperate I am.
But how can I as a Muslim do that. Any advice I'm desperate and don't want to live like this.
Seriously? Did you really do that? Please, dont!! See we all go through this problem. Some of us control, some dont. Nothing rare. Your background may have something to do with binge eating but i feel like you are overthinking.
Let me tell u this:
1) Write down your daily resolution of what you'll be eating.
2) As you eat something, note down that as well
3) Keep doing that and in the end of the day, compare it with what you had written as your resolution.
4) If you see that you hv eaten more, dont worry. Write down next day's resolution and keep on repeating.
In short, keep it day-to-day.
In few days you'll start seeing that just be getting organized and writing it down, you'll be more careful. And STOP thinking about other circumstances that lead to this.
1) Counting calories can help also for some people I know they simply looked up how much calories each food portions have and add up the calories to what you need 1500/day for ladies and 2000/day for men. so you eat what you like as long as the calories do not exceed your quota!
2) A doctor friend once told me his favourite diet plan! he said take your usual plate full of food, then throw half into the garbage, and then the remaining half put half in the fridge for eating later, and only eat what is left on the plate. it works wonders if you stick to your regular size dinner plates. it aint going to work if you switch to serving platters :-)
[Overeaters Anonymous Great Britain | For anyone with eating issues
Try joining a support group, it helps to listen to people who might be facing the same challenges and their coping strategies.](http://www.oagb.org.uk)
Bobby1- Thanks For your reply. Ur advice on removing all foods I binge on is not something I have used.
I guess I justify not doing this as my older child or husband may like a small snack of cookies or chocolate spread on toast.
I did suggest it to hubby once and he said to binge on fruit - if only it was that easy. He advised not to remove all junk. I buy occasional snacks for them but I eat them even though I dont enjoy the taste.
We r in the process of a kitchen refurbishment and the entire kitchen is getting replaced and the cupboards will be emptied. So you know what, what harm can it do? I haven't tried this so I will. After all when I get emotionally stressed and I go into zombie mode ready to binge on rubbish, If there's nothing to binge on I can't. I can't leave my kids at home to go to the local store to buy sweets.
If I manage to control the binge for approx 10 minutes the urge passes and I don't binge. But this is a rare occurrence these days.
Thanks for the advice. Psychologists often recommend distraction techniques that have never worked for me.
Please try it, it works like magic. If I have cake, cookies, chips at home I would inhale it. We hardly buy those things. There was also a study that suggested that people who have fruits and veggies on counter rather than junk food they are healthier. My children dont eat junk food either so removing it would be a favor to him also. When I buy a bag of chips the kids celebrate like it is Christmas. Eating meat is a great way of feeling full for a long time. A steak has same calories as 2 cookies but keeps you full for 8 hrs. Meat has a great satiating quality. We eat when we lack nutrients so please eat well
Well, the best suggestion would be to get rid of all the junk food, daily exercise & contacting a specialists that can advise you proper medication for your problem. Try using herbal medicines as they have no side effects.......!
Thanks for your replies guys. My head has been so messed up. It's not even about the food. It's about losing control and eating food I don't even like the taste off to numb feelings. It's so deep rooted. 99% of the time I eat normally and healthily. Then out of nowhere a small tension will come in my head- something trivial and I will get this extreme urge, it's so incredibly strong. I need to eat that second. I know it's connected to my emotions but I feel powerless to stop it.
I hate medication but If i don't get better I'm thinking of anti- depressants.
This is the only sadness I have in life. I'm fortunate in every other way. I don't have stresses like others do.Im aware of how blessed I am.
My husband always reminds me how fortunate I am too.
This is making my life hell. I can only describe it as though I feel high and spaced out when I binge. Nothing else matters.