Dual personality

Okay here it goes:

There is this gal that i know, she wears abbaya in normal routine but when it comes to wedding she wud take it off and wear half selevs, she wud have a hottest hair style, if needed she can talk to a guy without any hesitation and not just a conversation but he wud become her fan, she swears for small things, does chatting with random guys, and she still calls herself a “A simple gal”
IS THIS FAIR???

Now there is another aunty that i know, she went on haaj last year, she aslo wears abbaya and wud take it off in a wedding, wears make-up, heavy jewllery, wud dance on a wedding (doesn’t metter if there are na-maharm men over there watching her)

Would you call these two womens naik and shareef???

I don't know what this bit has to do with being naik and shareef?????

Re: Dual personality

We should not judge who's naik, it should be left up to ALLAH.

Agreed!!!

BUT, someone who has dual personality herself wud pass comments if someone else wears half sleves or does something similar to what she is doing i mean how is that fair?
She would always praise herself e.g. ohhh i have never ever applied make up and i don't even know how to apply it???????but when u see her next time she has make up on and when u question her she wud say ohhh saw on tv or something crap which doesn't even make sense :)

Re: Dual personality

Yes its not fair, but what are you gonna do???

These type of people are everywhere, so its better to just laugh and move on with it.

Re: Dual personality

All the stuff you posted, is generally not BAD...so, no, I wouldn't hold it against them if they're just having fun at a wedding. Give them a break for crying out loud. They make it a point to not have fun otherwise.

Re: Dual personality

Uhm, why don't you let them be? They might be thinking the same thing about you. Like Gaia said, Allah is the one who Judges. Not us.

werd to the motha...

^ We ALL are imperfect human beings that make so many mistakes.........we can't pass FINAL JUDGMENT on these two women. We are not Allah and neither are you. Are YOU naik and shareef? What is your definition of naik and shareef and paak and pure? Hijab? Is that your definition of naiki? There might be women who do hijab but also steal and cheat and tell lies and gossip. Are they more or less shareef than someone who doesn't cover their hair???? You sound naive.

^Can you change those women? Can you force them to behave however you want them to? No, sorry, you can't. It would have made more sense for you to create a thread where you ask us opinions on how to guide these women. But to create a thread asking us to pass a final verdict on whether or not she is "shareef" or "naik" is not right. That question is difficult to answer. Ask Allah instead. But be sure of your own "shareefness and naiki" before you do.

And "Naik" doesn't mean wearing a head covering. Naik, to me, refers to someone who is wise and does good/kind deeds to help others. Maybe these two women that you're talking about have helped many people throughout their lives.........maybe they have a very generous heart. And in that sense, they may be more "naik" than you. Humble yourself and think of your own mistakes and sins.

Re: Dual personality

whether or not you decide to wear a hijab is a matter of personal choice and personal comfort, and it has less to do with how righteous you are :)

^Maybe she doesn't apply makeup on a "regular" basis. I might say that I never put makeup on...which is kinda true....I don't wear it on a daily basis, often times not even at work. But that doesn't "LITERALLY" mean that I never wear makeup....I'll wear it for special occasions.

Do you see what I'm mean? The word "never" might mean "daily" to her. It's possible that SHE PERSONALLY feels that she doesn't know how to apply makeup. And maybe she did watch a video on it. You'll find youtube posts of makeup videos in the fashion forum. People watch them to learn and get ideas.
It's kind of like how someone might personally feel that "they don't know how to cook" because they think that they don't know how to make that many dishes or think that their dishes are mediocre.............but someone else might think "Wow, you DO know how to cook."

She puts makeup on. Big deal. Many women do and might be humble about their skills or can't keep track of how often they apply it.

If she and her dual personality make you feel that uncomfortable, just don't hang around her. Keep a distance. It'll be less stress for you. She's answerable to Allah....so leave it to Him. You worry about yourself only. The time that you could have used in doing something for yourself and your betterment......instead you're spending it on discussing her. Don't let her have that much power over you. Focus on yourself.

Re: Dual personality

and this bothers you because?

Re: Dual personality

Ive seen a lot of girls who wear hijab and do very interesting things. Sometimes we judge these girls a bit harshly because we expect so much more from them. Reality is, they're only human and prone to mistakes just as you and I are.

Hijab doesnt make anyone naik or shareef...its whats inside that counts.

p.s. - ive been to TONS of weddings where the ladies took off their hijabs as soon as they got into the banquet hall...i think some people look at it as more of a cultural thing than religious. Ya know?