sadness of a women is indeed very alluring. Who wouldn t feel drawn towards big beautiful sad eyes of a women, full of longing. It has a mesmerizing effect ... people feel captivated. When a women is sad, it shows her soft side, her sensitivity and feminity. Softness is what women is all about. Whereas, men is all about power and ego, he finds great pleasure in being a saviour. They have no problem lending a shoulder to a crying beauty. Some people think that womens' tears are her strongest yet softest weapon.
And the same goes if a guy does that ..once in a while...
And that not to say that they r using this as a ploy to fulfill their own insecurities or to become an Emotional Vampire:)
I think what you're describing is men who get an ego boost being the hero to a dependent, vulnerable woman. And women often are raised to be the 'caretakers'. So if a man is needy of her, she feels wanted and important. I don't think it's necessarily a situation of sadness in my opinion.
hmmm a good point.....truthfuly..i dont know ive never come across anything like that i think ill have to wait until im married
but there is one thing that people say alot "if u wanna be my freind then are u willing to get your face smashed in for me when im in need"
or if im wrong then i think i dont understand the scenario
You have made it a bit too harsh Massive...It shouldnt be like a DEAL..u know. It should more or less be mutual understanding that When in need you 'd be a friend that would be willing to step forward and try to help as much as that is in your power.Sometimes more or less, a few Kind words go a long way.And the trust should be there that you'd know that the person(your Friend0 would do the same if you were to be in any need of his/her assistance. To me that is friendship...not the "dime a dozen" friends that just hang out with you through the Good times, and vanish the moment (God forbid)a need arises...YOu know friends are the Family you choose for yourself,as with blood relations, one never gets to choose.:)...That is the reason why..I have few close Friends, but acquaintances r many.:)
I think what you're describing is men who get an ego boost being the hero to a dependent, vulnerable woman. And women often are raised to be the 'caretakers'. So if a man is needy of her, she feels wanted and important. I don't think it's necessarily a situation of sadness in my opinion.
We r not talking about Women only, Both men and women.But then there is a fine line between using sadness as an excuse to try to control/manipulate somebody else, and that would be dishonesty:)
i second this.
feeding the ego of anyone - Allah does not like.
even when we praise God, the praise is not one that sustains someone.
in human context, being social, as we are, having a good natured spirit is ultimately a stronger way of being - of being able to help someone when that person is shattered into pieces.
it is, a totally diferent story when you work on it and make it whole.
there could be no flaw in the caringness.
enough abuse eventually leads to self-abuse & dishonesty, and such evil doing does not go that far.
things do turn around. they take a good time and that should be natural.
a slow, peacemeal, turnaround, sadly when the bad individual had burnt all his or her boats.
I think what you're describing is men who get an ego boost being the hero to a dependent, vulnerable woman. And women often are raised to be the 'caretakers'. So if a man is needy of her, she feels wanted and important. I don't think it's necessarily a situation of sadness in my opinion.
Isn't sadness...an over all air of despair, seductive/alluring in nature.For men if its the lady in despair...they have this strong sense of becoming her saviour..rescuing her from it.Being her knight in shining Armour. On the other hand if its the guy who is the one showing his vulnerable side, it is even more alluring (as that is pretty much rare), and the girl wants to be the one consoling him and again the rescuing him from the despair. What are your opinions guys/girls? Have you experienced/observed such a phenomenon.May be you didnt realize that you were doing it:)
I get what you are saying...I agree its got its appeal, but then your intention would probly to make the other person smile again. That means the allure istemporary. I mean if you cant get them out of the sadness, I dont think you can live with the sad person for too long.
You have made it a bit too harsh Massive...It shouldnt be like a DEAL..u know. It should more or less be mutual understanding that When in need you 'd be a friend that would be willing to step forward and try to help as much as that is in your power.Sometimes more or less, a few Kind words go a long way.And the trust should be there that you'd know that the person(your Friend0 would do the same if you were to be in any need of his/her assistance. To me that is friendship...not the "dime a dozen" friends that just hang out with you through the Good times, and vanish the moment (God forbid)a need arises...YOu know friends are the Family you choose for yourself,as with blood relations, one never gets to choose.:)...That is the reason why..I have few close Friends, but acquaintances r many.:)