Ma Mooli and mystical miss thanks. Well ofcourse nobody is perfect and we're constantly educating each other.
Faisal--- its not about toking .Im not talking about minor things. Its not that I should know that I dont know all the answers, but everyone else should also know that everyones knowledge is limited. And I dont mean to boast or give an attitude to others. Its very simple. If somebody suggests something to me I will hear it out - I dont see why more of us cant do so.In many situations myself included.
The issue here is that when we put forth our suggestions, people think we're judging and thinking of ourselves above the ones being given the advice. A positive attitude is definatey a must in all debates not just those where religion is concerned.
unsolicited advice? Hmm what if I or someone else sees it as their duty to correct a wrong?
Its difficult, almost impossible, to give any kind of relevant advice without knowing the full facts (about this thread). So, we are basically guessing as to whats the situation and kinda going round in circles :)
I know ppl who hate unsolicited advice. You give it to them and they either ignore you, are enraged or simply avoid you in the future. So you may consider it your duty or whatever, but unless you know the other person well, you may just end up either being ignored, humiliated or avoided - and in all cases disappointed. Keep it simple in the beginning and see the tide. Tel dekho aur tel ki dhaar dekho.
and MQ: I think you can find just a glimpse of the topic in a thread I opened which went un-noticed in the midst of fights of your understanding is at fault …
also, there are numerous ayahs on Am’r Bil ma’aroof wa nahi anil munkar .. In addition the whole life-span of the prophet:saw: himself and then his:saw: companions Ridhwaanullah Aliyehai Ajma’een are living examples of the words of Allah:swt:
I think aaj kal ka zamana hi nahi hai that u can tell someone/something they are doing wrong.
We all know Islam, yet we all chose to follow whichever bits are convenient for us... Zina and alcohol are both forbidden but I know 2 people who of one has committed zina and one drinks alcohol but the one committing zina thinks alcohol is far worse.. Everyone has their own intpretation of whats right and wrong. everyone has different standards.
In this day and age I dont think anyone takes kindly to being judged and told what they are doing is wrong.
Live and let live is the best policy.
Allah ne sab ko aqal di hai - Its up to us if we use it.
Why is the day and age any different than before? I mean because times change we forget what we’re commanded to do so?
Correction by Anwar - yes its our duty.
Im letting people live as they want, Im only telling them what is right. Its not even my own interpretation - Zina and alcohol are stricly forbidden in Islam. This Im sure we all agree upon regardless of our own pesonal opinions. Allah has given all of us aqal but he has also given us enough aqal to be able to inform others when they are in the wrong. Shouldnt this aqal be used.
I can understand.... i have been in such a sitution alot of times.... but then i figure it out u can tell them whats right and whats wrong.. and if there mind doesn't allow them to know the difference between right and wrong then its not ur fault... alll you can do it tell them and what i do....
and just pray to Allah to guide them in the right path.... Ameen :)
yes MQ this aqal shud be used. but what im saying is they'l have aqal of their own - they just chose to use what they want.
If I do something wrong, I'll know its wrong. Maybe i'l have my reasons for doing it.. .. maybe i can square it with my conscience... but that doesnt mean I want someone telling me its wrong. more often than not - ill already know.
from my experience its often easy to forget that the object of the 'duty' is to keep them from bura'i. if you do it in a way as to make them defensive and only more intent on doing it, you're not doing your duty. and so the way you do it is as important as whether you do it or not.
Well sure you would. But then dont we all sometimes perhaps need a reminder? I mean sure there are some things we all do that are wrong, we just need a nudge from somebody to remind os hey we’re forgetting something.
Ravage-- I agree on that. tact haina. If we start of in an accusing tone the other person will get angry and he/she wont want to hear thw rest of it. But again Im sure how we carry out our duty is all a part of it.Agreed.
AD-- the final decision is up to the individual. The person giving the advice and information is not forcing anyone to do anything.
Some ayahs that I know Ive posted before.
**The male and female believers are friends of one another. They command what is right and forbid what is wrong, perform prayer and pay alms, and obey Allah and His Messenger. They are the people on whom Allah will have mercy. Allah is Almighty, All-Wise. (Qur’an, 9:71) **
**They believe in Allah and the Last Day, enjoin the right and forbid the wrong, and compete in doing good. They are among the righteous. (Qur’an, 3:114) **
Those who repent, those who worship, those who praise, those who fast, those who bow, those who prostrate, those who command the right, those who forbid the wrong, and those who preserve the limits of Allah: give good news to the believers. (Qur’an, 9:112)
I think its not the case of whether u tell a person they r wrong, its more a case of HOW u tell a person.
It seems to me so many people r, sometimes quite sincerely, fixated on telling a person what they r doing wrong, that they actually make it worse. E.g. if a friend doesn't pray u could tell them they must pray or u could just get up and pray in front of them, in the first case they could turn around and say no in which case u have made matters worse,in the second u have 'told' them, they can take it or leave it.
