I thought people gain more of an understanding as the years in a marriage roll on… but apparently thats not the case.
Two of my colleauges who are about a decade older than I, and most likely their marriages are a decade older too… were both discussing whether fights have increased.. or how often they fight (one is a male colleauge and the other a female) and I was shocked to hear that they both fight like “cats and dogs” with their respective partners… and they fight more now than they did before..
I am completely baffled.
I know the hubz and I had our issues to begin with… but Mashallah, things are different now. We do have the usual tid bits here and there… but nothing even on a weekly basis.. more like once a month kinda thing.. and even that depresses me.
So, couples who have been married for more than 5 years… does it get better or worst? Does the love change? in a good way? Im crossing my fingers and hoping to God, you all say ‘yes’
It doesn't get better or worse. It just stabilizes. You just become numb to each others bickering and although love reduces, the need for each other grows.
Dont say that the love reduces i think that u only get less passionated with time but at the same time respect increases…then comes other priorities like kids and stuff…the love gets distributed among the kids…the spouse doesnt remain the “center of attention” anymore…u just have to strive to keep that “missing passion” alive :halo: @sadzzz…the frequency of fight decreases…because u learn to compromise and ignore small petty issues that used to pinch u more earlier…so dont worry they are gone case i guess
n wat does happen wen only single patner wife or husband learns how to compromise n how to behave n other reamains 'FIX' on his/her rules n habbits n does nt ignore small issues then i think the fights always increase wid the years pass..
it depends on what kind of person you are temperamentally and what kind of person you are dealing with. I, for instance will never fight like cat and dog with anyone because Im simply not that type. I can get frustrated, talk a spade a spade, but I know when is the time to shut my mouth and be patient. Fortunately me and my husband both are cool temperament wise, or atleast we try not to cross limits and play patient. Strongly depends on the temperament.
i think after 4.5 years of marriage, I am the happiest now... so im hoping with the next 5 years, ive even doubly happier.. Inshallah.
I dont think only one person in the marriage compromises. Both do... maybe one does more than the other, but oh well. Whatever gets the two loving one another and keeping the marriage safe and sound... it'll work for me.
i think after 4.5 years of marriage, I am the happiest now... so im hoping with the next 5 years, ive even doubly happier.. Inshallah.
I dont think only one person in the marriage compromises. Both do... maybe one does more than the other, but oh well. Whatever gets the two loving one another and keeping the marriage safe and sound... it'll work for me.
Marriage is a power struggle relationship. If you are happy, very likely, it means that your husband has started to compromise much more than you (although it would not appear to you like that).
The reason is that the sources of happiness for a woman and a man are different. There is only a small subset where the happiness converges.
Marriage is a power struggle relationship. If you are happy, very likely, it means that your husband has started to compromise much more than you (although it would not appear to you like that).
The reason is that the sources of happiness for a woman and a man are different. There is only a small subset where the happiness converges.
actually, just to shock u, my hubby acknowledges that ive made more compromises than he has.
i think that u only get less passionated with time but at the same time respect increases…then comes other priorities like kids and stuff…the love gets distributed among the kids…the spouse doesnt remain the “center of attention” anymore…u just have to strive to keep that “missing passion” alive :halo:
they are gone case i guess 
