dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

Lifestyle Parenting, Household Affairs and Cuisine corner
1

well, men have always been called or expeted to be bread winners.

when a woman makes money, how does she divide it among the significant other, the combined house budget, herself, and if she has anything left from her own earned income, does any money makes to the savings?

share u novel stories on this.

2

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

Things have changed, and ppl much change with it. If both parties are earning than they should both contribute toward the living expenses, and after paying off all the bills, if there is any left over than they both can open a saving account, its very simple...ppl just like to make every thing so complicated for no reason at all.

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Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

Dushwari...do you mean when the woman is also making money...or that when the woman is the main breadwinner. If she is main breadwinner...well she has to contribute all to the house as well as the family as well as look after any savings...just as the man is expected to do. After all she would have no choice in the matter. If she is supplementing his income...well it all depends on how much disposable income they have doesn't it? If they are able to manage well enough on his income...she should have the perogative to consider it her own income. Surely she would consider the rainy day factor and keep savings aside.

Musk - Life is complicated... How many men would contribute **equal **share in housework and childcare?? However, earning women are expected to chip in their income equally?

4

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

Intersting question,

Being a man, I would not expect my spouse to contribute even if she is earning or to expect her to do a job to earn. I'd leave it to her optional and it would be perfectly fine with me if she wants to work or not. That will not be conditional to anything since it is my responsibility to provide these needs for the whole household.

Yes, as far as working is concerned, I'd be suportive to her if she chooses to work to make the best of her abilities and for the betterment of other, society and people.

5

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

i agree with musk...all the earnings should be put into a joint checking/savings account.

6

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

If wife is also working in addition to husband, nothing should change. Both salaries should go directly into joint checking account. All the bills should be paid and after everyday expense all the savings should go to joint savings account. Simple is that.

I have seen the tendency of saying "this is my money, i'll do whatever i wana do - everyday expense is men's responsibility" in many wives which i think is wrong. If husband is bound to support whole family, wife should take EQUAL part if she is earning unless hubby himself ask her to not contribute.

if i was your mummy
if i was your mummy
7

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

^^^

im sorry buddy but you are wrong! Islamically a woman has a right to do what she wants with her money as long as it's halal and is under no obligation to hand it over to her husband even if it is used to support the household. If she chooses to do so that is up to her and is for the better of the family if they need the second income.

Men shall take full care of women, because Allah has given the one more strength than the other, and because they support them from their means. Qur'an [4 : 34]

8

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

Improper use of a correct statement. In opst #5 you said something different and now you seem to contradict yourself.

I think decent 6chora is talking in terms of equality. Your reply is inturn substantiating his statement that there is a tendency to say this is my money etc etc although I know you don't have a wrong intention.

9

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

Sorry but looks like we have to agree on disagree.

If women is working full time and not fulfilling her responsibility (children are going to day care as oppose to be raised at home with stay-home mom etc), she has to contribute equally.

Its quite amazing that every single working women give the reference of same verses from Quran when it come to equally shearing the responsibility.

I remember a women activist form NGO in Pakistan (who was dying to get equal rights for women) was insisting on bypassing the line of males standing under red-hot sun at around 1:30pm to deposit their electric bill just because SHE WAS A WOMAN. She was like “aap ko sharam nahi aatee eik aurat itnee dair sai kharee hoie hai line main”, well if you want equal rights, WELCOME TO HELL …. !

And after saying all that, Let me remind you what I said in my post “…wife should take EQUAL part if she is earning unless hubby himself ask her to not contribute..”. I am a hubby and I have never asked my wife what she do of the pocket money that I give her and what she do with her own earnings. She asked me to deposit her earning in joint account but it was my decision that i denied.

10

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I have to agree, can’t resist laughing …

Great man you are … :blush:

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Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

just because some women want equal rights doesnt mean we should ignore the Quran!! it's quite clear and you can ask any scholar whether or not women are entitled to their property/monetary funds w/o having to give up any part of it to their husband. If they do....it's out of their own free will! This is a right women have in Islam...you nor any other man has a right to take that away from them.

Personally i would contribute.

12

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

u are being sarcastic right? raises a brow

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Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

and i totally agree to that but quran also prefer that they only work if needed. You ask any scholar and he will tell you that also. What i was amaized at is that gals are too quick to quote Quran for their “rights” but kinda ignore it when it comes to “Responsibilities” and once again this is not for you, I am talking in general .

ding ding di ding
14

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

i understand what ur saying....but guys tend to do the same thing 2. PPL like to bring up Islam when its convenient for them unfortunately.

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Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

I am all for women rights given they understand and accept their responsibilities too. And we all know that Islam has given more rights to women then any other religion !

:k:

16

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

including…what’s his is mine and whats mine is mine!! :stuck_out_tongue: :cb:

17

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

bhagoo yahaan sai :slight_smile:

18

Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

either way.

i feel that the social establishment make women feel (well yeah dependent), but also almost entitlement to live off of someone's income.
one can support, other can save. or do so together by sharing the current expenses, in a budgeted manner.

if u are educated and can work, respectably, as a woman, i do not see any problem in being supportive of a husband monetarily, as long as he is not a gold digger.

in case of single parents, moms by necessity have to be the sole bread winner for the house hold... so at the least what the society can do is promote a sense of self-reliance.

muslim and non muslim women in some societies are blessed that their husbands feel a sense of dignity in providing for their spouse, without indirectly controlling them. still, being productive is a good thing.

it is a natural law, for all species, to work for the survival and not become a parasite.

when true equal love abounds, it is even a romantic fun thing to do, to be able to live by, within one's means as a team of 2, to account for spending and be wise and protective of each others' incomes.

women gain weight and get depressed when they are home all day long, any way. and utilizing education for improvement of the society around oneself is a virtue waiting to be ceased by motivated people - women who envision themselves as civically involved and professionally proactive, without compromising their family routine obligations of tending and caring for the family within the house/home :>

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Re: dividing pay among your man, the house and your own self

Called me old fashion or...
but I think man has no right on the money earned by lady of the house.It her discretion