Re: dilemma.
You can always get married and have the opposing party sign a contract that says both parties will agree to allow the girl to finish her education, and that if there is a breach of contract there will be x, y, z consequences. At least that protects against the risk that the guy's family might trick the girl into marriage and then go back on their promises later.
I'd be pissed in her situation too. No sense in marriage until after education is complete. However, she's going for a PhD. That's beyond necessary education. I'm assuming with her bachelors/masters she can get a job easily. So the good thing is that she's done enough education that if the phd gets cut because of children, she can always still do things she wants with her life.
And Phd is a very flexible sort of a degree. You can spend loads of years working on your Phd, and you'll still be a PhD in your subject area whether it took you 4 years to do it or 7.
If it was a lower more essential degree like a bachelors/masters/professional level degree, then I would say she shoudl work on the degree first, so that she can get it out of the way.
But a PhD is flexible, usually. At least in the fields I'm familiar with. You can plan it around a family lifestyle, and PhD programs are pretty understanding about it.