A Pakistani relative pointed out that South Asian desis can be two faced-i.e. they’ll pretend to respect an elder but hate them and that American born desis may be considered non traditional, but at least they are honest.
Comments?
I agree to the american born desi part.
Re: Differences b/n desi and western communicating styles
a pakistani relative may have stated that because american born desis are very opinionated. in the pakistani culture one is taught to respect an elder no matter what because of their age and experience, so respect is valued over honesty. thats just my opinion lol
Re: Differences b/n desi and western communicating styles
What are the advantages/pluses of being honest?
A Pakistani relative pointed out that South Asian desis can be two faced-i.e. they'll pretend to respect an elder but hate them and that American born desis may be considered non traditional, but at least they are honest.
Comments?
IMO, this seems right. Im an ABCD and to this day sometimes the politics of the desi society eludes me. I just dont care enough and maybe thats my problem. If I dont like you, you will know. If I like you, you will know as well.
:)
This is an interesting comment. What eludes you?
Re: Differences b/n desi and western communicating styles
What eludes me is the whole saas-bahu tug of war over the son. In American culture, there is a "live and let live" kind of attitude about in-laws. Interference is considered wrong here. Among desies, its considered almost mandatory.
Have you ever read a thread from a guy about his FIL???
The silent competition all women have with one another.
I recently read a thread in Household where one lady gave the wrong recipe for something because she didnt want anyone to cook like her!!! I mean COME ON!
Honestly, I hope my inlaws are straightforward people. They dont have to sugary sweet to me all the time, just honest. Thats it. That way, I know what Im dealing with.
Re: Differences b/n desi and western communicating styles
p squared,
"silent competition" is about power and hierarchy within the familial system. female family members don't have to participate in it-but many do. same with males.