Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
To the posters who keep saying 'there is no such thing as love' never having experienced it doesn't mean it can't/doesn't exist..
Love is energy and for energy we have law
"energy can neither be created nor destroyed but it can change from one form to another"
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
I would say my parents might have missed out on the puppy love, I appreciate all that you do, wear etc phase but they did end up finding true love MA. They had their ups and downs in their lives..but they came out stronger and ended up appreciating, loving and caring for each other even more. May Allah bless them a long healthy life together (Ameen) 
Like Reha says love has different ways of expresssion and meanings to different people. But yes I do agree that the respect and appreciation that we receive from our SO/hubbies etc are way more than what our moms had. Different times and circumstances.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
I think the type of relationship that Gaia is referring to (missing out on love) is where the relationship feels more like an obligation - an obligation to provide for the other person, to take of the home you've made together and the other person has been more of a habit in one's life rather than a choice to be with them.** It almost feels as if the partners could have been interchangeable with any other person and you don't appreciate how special the specific person you are with is**.
Yes, that's another way to explain it.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
We weren't tehre for the honeymoon period of our parents (I was born 11 years after their marriage) so I cant say much but the love that you are referring to is very much a honeymoon love!! and I am sure they had their fair share of it!! In fact they have pics to prove that.. those 70's black and white pics in Murree (honeymoon spot in Pakistan).
Rest, my dad may have never told her about her dress, hair etc infront of us but he respected her opinions so much that I wish guys these days had more respect for their significant otehrs than the puppy love!
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
God bless everyone’s ammi abu.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
Diwana, Kakaballi, wane- I'm talking about love where you can COMPLETELY drop your guard and be able to appreciate your partner for EVERYTHING, and I mean everything. I used the word childish because there should be one person in this world who you don't have to feel like an adult with ALL the time; even if you're the most mature person.
And I think a lot of women (moms, khalas, phupos, etc.) missed out on that.
Reha- That's beautiful, mA'
The point was that despite the fact that, for everyone the true love means different; what you mentioned and concluded from it was not true in first post.
We can never tell if our parents/Grand parents did never let their guards down. And letting the guards down has whole different meaning by itself.
The time when our parents/Grand parents grew up had different expectations and standards of showing 'love'.
In fact in some societies in past 'expressing love' has been considered not a norm. Still is.
Also talking about intimacy was not considered appropriate. Still is.
All this does not mean they missd out anything. **We just cannot generalize that.
**You mentioned about having 'O' and not having 'O' by some women.
And you think having 'O' is somehow related to true love?
I sure hope you did not mean that.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
Is it weird but I find my parents, especially my dad VERY romantic and cute. They always were expressive, although my mom is kinda’ shy 
, and I always saw them holding hands, saying i love you, my dad being mushy and singing embarrassing songs and both of them always being so caring and giving and so attached to one another. So aside from ACTUAL love, they had the puppy love too.
My dad still tells us the stories of him and my mom before they got married and how he would sneak around stalker-level to see her and she was just so snooty 
and ignored him. But then she also remembered how he loved Ray-Bans so she got him aviators as her first present before they got married. And even now, my dad calls her the most beautiful woman (she seriously is gorgeous, my school crushes would end up having a crush on her!) and never forgets her birthdays (he’s most likely to forget us kids’ birthdays instead) and their engagement/wedding anniversaries.
So I think people can have that puppy love type of love at any age. People that want to expressive it will express it regardless so I’m glad I had good role models to learn it from. My fiance on the other hand has parents exactly like OP/Gaia’s. They don’t fight but his dad pretty much doesn’t pay attention to his mom and my fiance was once expressing how much he loved me in front of his mom and how I am so beautiful (ahem) and she started crying and said “kaash mere liye bhi yain koi kehta”. Broke my heart.
So men, please try to be expressive and at least word out how much you appreciate and love your wives/SO/fiancees. PLEASE.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
**Just like true beauty does not necessarily requires make up to show,
....true love does not necessarily be expressed 'verbally'.**
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
**Just like true beauty does not necessarily requires make up to show,
....true love does not necessarily be expressed 'verbally'.**
Not true, a word here and there doesn't hurt. It doesn't mean you act like you lick the ground they walk on, just a simple 'i love you', 'thank you' or even a romantic gesture such as holding hands doesn't hurt.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
My parents definitely missed out on true love. So much that i feel so bad i want to make sure that the rest of their life is beautiful Inshallah. Do so much for them that the love that was deprived is forgotten. I want my mom to say that she thoroughly enjoyed her life as opposed to "zindage bas aisey hi guzar gai"
I wouldnt blame arranged marriages because i have seen love marriages go wrong as well.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
Not true, a word here and there doesn't hurt. It doesn't mean you act like you lick the ground they walk on, just a simple 'i love you', 'thank you' or even a romantic gesture such as holding hands doesn't hurt.
I carefully wrote that by adding word 'necessarily'.
Now please read that again.
All that means that it is not 'necessary' to express verbally the true love but certainly is a complementary to actions.
The maadern world has planted in the heads of women that.......
if the guy does not say ' I love you', it means he does not love you.
If he does not notice new hairdo, he does not care!
If he does not hold hands in public, kisses her in the public, carresses her on back, he must not be interested in her...
If he does not remember the birthdays, wedding anniversary, first meal together, he is unromantic and does not 'love her'.
You know, all these gestures are sweet and romantic, but does not mean he has 'true love' for her.
True love is when she is sick, he is there, he is concentrating on making her life pleasant, safe, easy, and he does not let anyone harm her....
Words are just complementary to all these.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
'Romance' is so bloody commercialised these days...just like everything is in life today.
This whole teeny style coochie coo puppy love expectations of 'true love' are so dangerous and corrupting...really they are.
Some of you act like as if the oldies in your family were living in stone age. I bet any money that puppy love did take place, but the thing is, it only took place within the four walls of their bedroom. Sadly in those days they didn't have facebook, GS forum, twitter, camera phones, text massages, free calls to show off their love or romance to others or to one another. They kept it to themselves....there was a fine world with normal humans in it before this whole Sex and the City culture came in to place.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
^Why are you so angry? Who asked you to be a part of any of this? get off GS, Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, and everything else. Stop using cell phones too...
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
^Why are you so angry?.
Nah I'm not angry. Its just writing style I guess.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
I think the love my parents share is so pure. MashaAllah. They don't need "things" to express that love, just feelings and loyalty towards each other.
There isn't anything wrong with compliments and such, but I think the biggest compliment my dad has given my mother is that he cannot live a day without her. I'd take that any day over oh honey you look so lovely but I don't care a damn what time you come home. Yes you can have both, but not everyone gets the same package.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
^Why are you so angry? Who asked you to be a part of any of this? g*et off GS, Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, and everything else. Stop using cell phones too..*.
Err WT ..F?
Now I ask you to read my post before getting the knickers in a twist.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
^You implied we are abnormal so I ask why would you want to be a part of the abnormal crowd?
I am just pangay karing :@:
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
My dad and some of his friends are 10X more romantic than most guys today.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
I think the love my parents share is so pure. MashaAllah. They don't need "things" to express that love, just feelings and loyalty towards each other.
There isn't anything wrong with compliments and such, but I think the biggest compliment my dad has given my mother is** that he cannot live a day without her**. I'd take that any day over oh honey you look so lovely but I don't care a damn what time you come home. Yes you can have both, but not everyone gets the same package.
I'm referring to this, not material things. These are the compliments which make you melt into a big princess puddle of love. Going back to my original post, this what my Mom meant when she was talking about me and my SO, it's this level beyond respect and just care.
Re: Did Our Moms Miss Out on True Love?
there is no such thing as true love
emo