A lot of times. Not me. But guys. They often stare and try to speak. Even after my marriage.
I don't know why but I don't appreciate this, so my gaze is kind of enough and clear to them to keep them from approaching me. After my marriage, I totally ignore such people but a lot of ladies will understand here the "kind" of men.. who becomes irritation at a level that even if you ignore them, they don't back off... they are really annoying.
That is very disrespectful :( I mean even before marriage but after marriage they should not entertain such thoughts. Unke ghar mein ma bhen nahi hai kya. I don't understand the staring either. :/
Recently I was attending a distant relative's shaadi and when my brother walked into the hall (I had not seen him in about a year), I hugged him quite happily. Seeing this, some random aunty behind me made a comment saying, such besharam people, hitting on each other and giving jhappis so openly like this. I turned around and before I could say anything, one of my aunts who was nearby said to her.. aunty jee, that is her brother! That aunty then turned various shades of red in seconds and ignored me the rest of the night.
So question to the guys..how would you feel if a desi girl approached you? Would you think she is way too "maadran" as slims like to say?? I don't think there is anything wrong in a guy approaching a girl if he is interested in her or a girl approaching a guy if she is interested in her. Gone are the days when people used to think of it as a taboo. In fact I would prefer that if a guy is interested me he approaches me himself, instead of involving other people to get introduced.
Buhahhahahah… in fact… erm… I don’t seem married and quite a lot of people get shocked when I tell them I am married so that might be the reason. Secondly, since I had to live a year or two without my hubby in Pakistan before shifting here… and my hubby wasn’t attending the marriages so that was an obvious clue for the random guys that I was single
Unke ke sath hotay huay koi nazar utha ke to dekhe
Those days are only gone because you’re imagining a prince charming approaching you. What if the poor guy is more Govinda than Hritik Roshan? Then you’d be all, eww Desi guys are such pervs.
Umm generalization much?? Someone who’s a prince charming to me maybe a “Govinda” to someone else and vice versa. I can only speak for myself. So just because I don’t find someone attractive does not mean that I think they are pervs. Unless of course they openly make suggestive comments or give dirty looks.
So I guess it's just me who has never been approached by a random guy(s) at a wedding? Maybe cause I'm not pretty.
I'm sad now. :(
Don't be sad yaar :) You were most likely so beautiful they got intimidated. Or your beauty like glaring sunshine may have bedazzled them affecting their vision and making them unable to approach you.
haha kisi ki itni guztakhi ke aap ko aise waqt approach karein when you’re with your husband. Then jo bhi saza mile manzoor honi chaiye. Even if you’re on your own assume nahi karna chaiye. they can ask others or ask you before approaching. :)aur agar galti se approach kiya to maafi mangni chaiye politely and move on. Then I am sure no one will mind as much. and what is with the staring people do? staring should only happen when someone is with their spouse across from a candlelight dinner and you’re playing the “let’s see who blinks first” game.
i'll wait for the girl to make a move first!...this will save me from possibility of her jootis falling on my head! :D
Girls will be hesitant because of judgmental double standards and howthey will be perceived so it is important to give an indicator of interest thatyou are the Prince Charming/Raj kumar of their dreams. The person she has been waiting for. And ofcourse to let them know you are open minded and nonjudgemental. This is best done when standing in a never ending queuewaiting for food. Ideally you would be lined behind the girl you are interestedin and with one other friend with you. Then you would casually have arandom conversation along the lines of "do you think weddings are a good place tofind a jeevan saathi?" and with you responding "pata nahi. yahanbahut log hain but shayad nazar ek larki pe tiki pe hui hai..jiska mann uske chehra ki tara sundar hai and jo itni talented hai.. or maybe somethingless tacky/cliché" This would only be loud enough for you and the girl tohear. At this moment you would be at the part of the line where food is beingserved and you can give a side glance for the briefest of moment to let herknow you are there. Then you engineer a few more memorablemoments during the shaadi for eg. accidentally colliding into her,apologising and helping her pick up any things she has dropped. By the end ofthe night if she has any interest she will approach or ask another friend/relative to approachyou. If she never does woh larki taqdeer mein kabhi thi hi nahi.
That way there is minimial risk of jootis and rejection as it is indirectand you can always think maybe she never interpreted the signs in the wayyou wanted. She may also think the same. Both sides happy. lol seriously a book could be written on this topic as it is so interesting. "DesiShaadi: just a wedding or an avenue to find a long lost soul mate." but I think a girl should only be approached in such a way if someone is serious about it and genuine..not as a timepass thing in a wedding.
Gentlemen- have you ever approached a random pretty girl at a desi wedding?
Ladies- have you ever been approached by a man at a wedding who tried chatting you up? Or have you ever approached a dude because milnay ka dil karta hai?
Is there any way to approach a random at a shaadi without all the aunties going "haww hayee"?
Not quite, I remember once telling my brother there's a girl who looks hot without realising her brother was within earhot and probably heard me :/
Have I approached someone in wedding. Yes and no..but I would love..if I happen to find someone interesting I dont hesitate getting know them. Not sure if it is my social nature...but I know for the fact that..agar koi milli tu..without wasting any minute..i would prefer to introduce myself to her. I like straight forward approach.
