desi and dating

Lifestyle Relationships
1

i always found the two terms going side by side a bit awkward.I mean since when it got acceptable by our culture to date?I thought it was always supposed to be desi ammas abba looking for their children.And every time they know their kid is rebelling against their decision ,there’s bollywood style drama .Now those who date,i believe they are a bit confused or just that times are changing or is it not?

2

Re: desi and dating

I wonder if you have ever read 200 years old poetry from 'our culture' or even watched pre-80s movies from Pakistan.

3

Re: desi and dating

times are indeed changing but IMO desi still don't know how to "date" emotionally. There is always some percentage of bollywood drama mixed in.

4

Re: desi and dating

wat is ‘emotinal dating’ ?? :konfused:

5

Re: desi and dating

or do you mean desi don't know how to date unemotionally. like robots going through each person, weeding out the ones that arent compatible and making sure the right check boxes are checked before plunging into it emotionally.

6

Re: desi and dating

if dating is wrong, ammas going on the hunt for who they prefer isnt right either.

7

Re: desi and dating

What's the big deal? Why can't everyone find their spouse the way they're comfortable, be it love marriage or arranged?

8

Re: desi and dating

a lighter version of that.

My little cousin that when they like/date a "desi" guy - they hear wedding bells in their heads.

9

Re: desi and dating

^what's wrong with going into a relationship thinking of marriage?

oh it's cool to just date around first.

10

Re: desi and dating

if hadn’t dated .. i wouldn’t have gotten married yaar. my lack of household/kitchen skills had compelled my parents to reject every rishta that ever came and i never even got the wind of it … :rotfl: … seriously … when i was about to get married, i asked my mother … “mama, meray liye kabhi koi rishta nahi aya? mein itni buri houn?” hahahahahaahhaha

and now look at me … meinay bari eid k liye raan banai thi :blush:

11

Re: desi and dating

couldn't agree more :)... i dont know why people make it so difficult ...

12

Re: desi and dating

Well dating, under the western sense, is haram Islamically.

Then there is “Islamic dating” :smiley:

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/02/13/nyregion/13dating.html?_r=1&scp=1&sq=islamic%20dating&st=cse

13

Re: desi and dating

Actually I read that article fully after posting it. Instead of mocking that nonsense, I should add constructive comments:

  • MOST guys don't exactly want to meet the girl AND HER father at the same time. A mother/sister/cousin would soften the blow.
  • All this talk about earning power/money is crass on both sides. If the dude is a lawyer, assume that the couple will be ok. No need to bring out the dolla dolla bills.
  • Why do at at a hotel, convention style? How about renting out a restaurant (private party style) or have some aunty through a party on the roofdeck.
  • Speed dating? Ewww. How about niche dating, traditionalist nights (hijabis/beardos holla), professionals night (need a masters to get in).

Ok I have thought way too much about this..