Nadia & Lost Soul 
(hug) 
Irem I agree ...inshallah ....I am going to get a Quran soon with translation and read it .
Qirus...My daily routine is heavy already .....I also hold a Purple belt in Ju-Jitsu....but now a days I am off it ....probably should get back.
RT I think u r quite rite thats all I need it has been a long time :)
Nadia well said ..I will ponder upon it a bit more.
Thank u all (shukria) for ur concern and advice.....Just imagine ....reading it helped me so if I follow it I will be ...:)
I really do feel for you PKC.
I'm depressed within the family unit let alone having to live outside !!! jk.
Keep yourself occupied and keep your lifestyle varied so it doesn't become monotonous. Write down how you feel :) that always helps. And don't take them lotions and potions you're currently swigging :-(
Get a female companionship. It helps.
Don't go for a female just for the heck of it. Unless you don't feel for the person, don't give in. I am telling you, it will add to your miseries.
Nahhh dude, I know the perfect solution for u.
It takes time and willpower but u will feel much better!!!
I had/have same problem like u lekin only for 5/6 yrs now (the reason I m seeing a shrink ;) )
But without any help, I just changed the depression into anger and hate. The anger is awesome man, I feel incredibly when it happens and the adrenaline rushes like hell. But the trick is u have to control it. Especially when I am in a fight or under a lot of pressure my mind works like crazy and I can c everything clear. The hate, is a bit harder, and I don’t understand it myself much but its definitely there. If some 1 hurts me or some one else, I start to hate that person and I don’t talk to him/her anymore ever again which works great for me 2
Trey it man, lekin u have 2 loose the depression or it will tare u apart!!!!!!!
Hate.
The purest of feelings.
The lightest of evils.
Fear it not,
only fear to not.
Hate progresses, hate leaves a mark.
Hate can't get worse,
hate won't die out,
too much, too many, too few too holy.
Need to hate,
it's inspiration, making you think.
it's an investment, making you strong
Change things in your life. Sometimes its just the mundane repition of things.
Talk to a friend, have some peacueful time doing exactly what you want with who you want..
Talk to mom ..
best of luck.. let me know if there is anything I can do.
:)