as sons, and as daughters, what does obedience mean to each one of us?
share if you like. this is first question in the thread.
best,
Dushwari
p.s. an opinion: obedience to own biological parents is listening to their advice,
and not annoying them when they are right, but it also includes the really fine and caring relationship due to which they can offer comfort in understanding their off spring and getting convinced that the off spring is right in a choice or a decision. obedience from parents cannot be attained by force or manipulation.
Aashi,
how so, sister?
it is a simple query, no?
disrupting the language of laid back attitudes takes a hell of loading.
for a healthy discourse's sake, this dialog has to be pursued by like minded people.
i am sure at some point in life, it will cross everyone's mind and challenge the idea of 'livng' without completely knowing concepts that confine, limit or hold or on the contrarry MAY teach fair balance.
the question is: who is smart and wise to do that fair balance and not misuse the concept of obedience and escape from personal responsibility.
concept is simple, whats hard is always fulfilling it: parents should always be obeyed AS LONG AS their commands are not against that of Allah SWT.
I make the very best effort to obey my parents, but if there is something I strongly disagree with, Alhmdulillah we have the kind of relationship where I can respectfully discuss the matter with them.... this includes both my Mum and Dad... Alhumdulillah it hasn't been hard obeying my parents too much bcoz theyv'e always explain WHY things are important instead of just forcing me into something (years back, b4 i started wearing a hijab, my parents would teach me its importance, adn Alhumdulillah when the time came, we were able to ease into it bcoz we knew it was the right thing to do...)
I dont follow paki dramas, but this is something i saw on tv back in paki... a son caused his dad to suffer a stroke, and his mum told him to get lost, but b4 he left, she was like "yaad karo, aggar maa ke aik paon ke neeche jannat hai to doosre paoon ke neechi jahannum"... so true!
“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: ‘My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young’” [al-Israa’ 17:23]
i agree. obedience to parents cannot be impervious to an openness to indiacte what one would want to have or be, of course, with a sense of personal responsibility to adopt whoever or what ever one indicates that he/she wants to ot would try to.
respectfully disagreeing is possible with parents, in fact it is healthy as it indicates a mature friendly and trustworthy understanding relationship as a caregiver to a grow up child.
thanks for sharing, Pinks.
best,