Re: Decent females?
I can see how a lot of women can be very open about sex. Most of my friends were married before me but we never really went into details about sex lives because there were a few of us who werent married. Maybe they talked about it amongst each other?
Re: Decent females?
islamically u r forbidden to discuss ur sex life openly.notorious why u let ppl intimidate u.if u won't answer they won't continue.when i got married all my colleagues used to ask things.raat ko kia kia,kia hova n i used to tell them "raat ko bus saath namaz parhi,thora quran parha phir so gaiy"n when my SIL used to wonder abt that showerthing"shower nahi laina aaj?'' i used to say zaroorat nahin hai.
Re: Decent females?
Okay, that is wierd...asking if you took a shower or not the next morning?
Re: Decent females?
saeein is 100% right about ladies discussing their private stuff moe often then men, and its not marginally more, it is significantly more. I have pals from every faith, race etc. conservatve, liberal, whatever..and really not a single time has anyone talked about their their sexual relations with their wife, ever.
women on the other hand..ladies, you know it..
now the 'bragging' of conquests and whatnots in college days for one night hookups at frat parties, yeah there guys may brag more than girls, but that is a whole diff situation.
btw this is not just limited to sex life but to all aspects fights with spouse, issues with inlaws etc. Its very rare that guys would go discuss their home life even with friends.
a very clear example of that is even on this website. I really dont see many blogs where guys are dissing their wife, or writing about their issues with her or run ins with inlaws.
Notorious yes I agree, unequal treatment is branndished out by society. This transcends cultures, in the West if a man sleeps around he’s a Casanova whilst a women is regarded as a whore.
Unjust treatment maybe due to the fact that women are more likely to be exploited (e.g. physical weakness) or suffer the consequences (e.g. pregnancy) making it necessary for societies to create taboos for the protection (or as I perceive the suppression) of women.
Furthermore sex is a natural healthy part of a relationship. A high sex drive in either sex is perhaps frowned upon because it leads to insecurity.
Widening the debate. Sex should be discussed with close confidents who can dispense personalised advice (you’re close friends or relatives, primary care practioner or the local aalim/aalima).
Islamically our parents should teach us once we reach maturity but unfortunately with all my peers it’s more about exploration and experimentation rather than education.
I know Asian females have poor breast cancer survival rates due to late diagnosis and high proportion of Asian men who are impotent (diabetes etc) refuse to seek help. They rather sweep such issues under the carpet.
Myself included, I am afraid we resort to inappropriate discussions. Such as sharing our private intimate moments, the exchange of cheap sexual innuendoes and the use of vulgar language when trading insults rather than having mature productive deliberations. Quite perverse.
care to share which men in your life or family like to brag about their sexual victories ? i have yet to see / meet a man who so blatantly or openly talks about sex, be it with his wife or mistress...
men are often very tight lipped about their sexual life...which sadly is not the case when it comes to women...
as about the show....she is there to help n am assuming is an expert in sex...you cannot compare an expert like her to girls/women talking about sex in coffee shops or malls...unless they too are experts in sex...which is just laughable...like HA HA HA!!!
Where exactly did I say the men in my life or family did??
Regarding the show, yes she is a doctor but there's no rule that says u need to be an 'expert' to be able to give advice or participate in discussions about sex and to suggest otherwise is ridiculous imo.
Btw talking of sex, has anyone noticed that the girl in the orange salwar khameez in the Mehndi.com adverts on this site is hardcore porn star Sunny Leone lol
Re: Decent females?
Cauz action speak louder than words. So be Nike (Just do it) :p
Where exactly did I say the men in my life or family did??
Regarding the show, yes she is a doctor but there's no rule that says u need to be an 'expert' to be able to give advice or participate in discussions about sex and to suggest otherwise is ridiculous imo.
Btw talking of sex, has anyone noticed that the girl in the orange salwar khameez in the Mehndi.com adverts on this site is hardcore porn star Sunny Leone lol
and this
A lot of my female friends take about sex but not in a 'bragging' way the way a lot of men do,
now if these are not the men in your life [friends , enemies , colleagues , family members , relatives etc] then exactly which men are you talking about? aasman se tapaktay hain yaan zameen se ugtey hain yeh so called *bragging about their sex lives men**...
and this
now if these are not the men in your life [friends , enemies , colleagues , family members , relatives etc] then exactly which men are you talking about? aasman se tapaktay hain yaan zameen se ugtey hain yeh so called *bragging about their sex lives men**...
It's not difficult to understand. My exact words:
'....the way a lot of men do'
Obviously the statment means men generally.
The statement doesn't imply anywhere that the men in question are part of my life and if u think it does u need to improve ur English.
In certain situations people expect you to talk about sex and if you don't, you get in trouble, in Holland it's like that anyway. I was in a place where people go if they have all kinds of problems, I didn't talk about sex, I was uncomfortable, so I didn't discuss it. They found me suspicious. There were non-Pakistani females at a few places I worked for a while, they were discussing sex, when I didn't say anything, they found me suspicious too!
I'm not used to discussing that topic much with anyone. Mother in law used to ask and say certain things, though she was very strict in life. But what she wanted were grand children. Since I was still in school, during the first half year of the marriage, of course I didn't get pregnant, not until I lived with him. That was her interest, so her reason for asking questions about it.
For the rest, I've never discussed it. I had non-Pakistani female friends who, when they knew I had left my cousin, started to ask me when I would have another relationship. That's all they cared about. They always discussed their boyfriends and whatever. They found me suspicious too, for not talking about sex, for not going after males, people make lies against you if you're alone.
Pakistanis make lies against me, because they believe my family who denies having forced me into marriage and because I'm a divorcee. Non-Pakistanis make lies against me, because I'm a divorcee and I don't go after males, so that makes me suspicious in their eyes. Everybody is nasty towards divorcees. All people care about is, if you have a sex life or not, they don't look at your character, you can be a very interesting decent person, but they won't respect you one bit, all they are curious about is a divorcees sex life.
In certain situations people expect you to talk about sex and if you don't, you get in trouble, in Holland it's like that anyway. I was in a place where people go if they have all kinds of problems, I didn't talk about sex, I was uncomfortable, so I didn't discuss it. They found me suspicious. There were non-Pakistani females at a few places I worked for a while, they were discussing sex, when I didn't say anything, they found me suspicious too!
I'm not used to discussing that topic much with anyone. Mother in law used to ask and say certain things, though she was very strict in life. But what she wanted were grand children. Since I was still in school, during the first half year of the marriage, of course I didn't get pregnant, not until I lived with him. That was her interest, so her reason for asking questions about it.
For the rest, I've never discussed it. I had non-Pakistani female friends who, when they knew I had left my cousin, started to ask me when I would have another relationship. That's all they cared about. They always discussed their boyfriends and whatever. They found me suspicious too, for not talking about sex, for not going after males, people make lies against you if you're alone.
Pakistanis make lies against me, because they believe my family who denies having forced me into marriage and because I'm a divorcee. Non-Pakistanis make lies against me, because I'm a divorcee and I don't go after males, so that makes me suspicious in their eyes. Everybody is nasty towards divorcees. All people care about is, if you have a sex life or not, they don't look at your character, you can be a very interesting decent person, but they won't respect you one bit, all they are curious about is a divorcees sex life.
Find some decent friends and stay the hell away from your family (no offence but they sound like complete and utter ************'s )
Exactly what I hate about our culture - a divorced woman is treated as an outcast, can't even let her around a bride in case she brings bad luck
Well screw them, these people aren't worth a dime - they only behave this way because they have nothing better to do in their asanine lives than to wag their tongues and sew shalwar kameez for their 110th grandchild
I've seen pretty much the best of both worlds without being a divorcee. People want a scapegoat, they have heirachy and they need to put someone at the bottom of the food chain
You just have to ignore such vermin - and stop thinking you will ever win them over. The minute you start ignoring people and stop being so nice to everyone, you will notice people starting to respect you
It's not difficult to understand. My exact words:
'....the way a lot of men do'
Obviously the statment means men generally.
The statement doesn't imply anywhere that the men in question are part of my life and if u think it does u need to improve ur English.
from where these lot of men come to brag about their sex live? thats all i want to know.
Where exactly did I say the men in my life or family did??
Regarding the show, yes she is a doctor but there's no rule that says u need to be an 'expert' to be able to give advice or participate in discussions about sex and to suggest otherwise is ridiculous imo.
Btw talking of sex, has anyone noticed that the girl in the orange salwar khameez in the Mehndi.com adverts on this site is hardcore porn star Sunny Leone lol
Seriously? no - I don't know who she is and I don't want to google and get fired! what do you think - they cropped her head on another image?
WEIRD!
Re: Decent females?
I don't think men talk about THEIR own sex lives. I think they makes jokes and very general type of conversation about the topic
Women on the other hand - talk a lot. Some don't know when to stop and divulge too much information that no one really wants to hear.
Having said that - I do think there needs to be channel for women and men to talk about sexual issues to someone that can guide an coach. I don't know who.
Ahem saieen sir…they all learned it from the OPRAH Show…
