About a month ago, my dear mother passed away after a long illness. My beloved father passed away earlier a few years ago.[INA LILAHi WA INA ILLAHI RAJEOON] Although I have been with them but unfortunately, in their last moments, I was not beside them [In both cases, I went outside for a few minutes and they expired in my absence]. I wish I were there and do any last service for them or some effort to save them. anyways, it is all over now.
I have that feeling in me that I couldn’t do much for them in their life.
I would like you guys to enlighten me as what can I do in their favor other than prayers, in their afterlife. If you quote quran or hadith, pls do quote complete reference. thx
If parents leave one thing behind: Good Children; then they automatically become a Sadqa Jaaria for them. Pray for maghfarat of your parents. I Alhamdolillah have both my parents and I cant even imagine loosing them. But as Allah says that every Soul shall taste death hence I can only hope to have help from Allah.
**first of all i offer my condolences on ur loss. inna nillaahi wa inna ilaihi raaje'oon. sorry but i'm unable to give u complete references but we learned from childhood that the best thing u can do for deceased loved one, as the d-tox..ef said, to pray and thats the only thing reaches them. once they die, their deeds come to an end but the best asset they leave behind is their children who will pray for them and will keep sending the sawaab of ibaada for them. thats the best gift ever. this is sadqa-e-jaariya [continuing charity]
if they didn't do haj, u can do it for them...its called Hajj-e-badal...but u have to do ur's first. every year u can have qurbani in their name. u can do tasbeeHaat everyday. i don't think u can do namaaz for them. thjeir qazaa-e-umri is not due on any1. [qazaa-e-umri = prayers that people miss their lives...a lot of people do a lil everday to somehow catch up on missed namaaz]
**first of all i offer my condolences on ur loss. inna nillaahi wa inna ilaihi raaje'oon. sorry but i'm unable to give u complete references but we learned from childhood that the best thing u can do for deceased loved one, as the d-tox..ef said, to pray and thats the only thing reaches them. once they die, their deeds come to an end but the best asset they leave behind is their children who will pray for them and will keep sending the sawaab of ibaada for them. thats the best gift ever. this is sadqa-e-jaariya [continuing charity]
if they didn't do haj, u can do it for them...its called Hajj-e-badal...but u have to do ur's first. every year u can have qurbani in their name. u can do tasbeeHaat everyday. i don't think u can do namaaz for them. thjeir qazaa-e-umri is not due on any1. [qazaa-e-umri = prayers that people miss their lives...a lot of people do a lil everday to somehow catch up on missed namaaz]
i pray for u. aameen**
Thanks for your kind words. appreciate them. Are you sure we can do qurbani in their name?
If parents leave one thing behind: Good Children; then they automatically become a Sadqa Jaaria for them. Pray for maghfarat of your parents. I Alhamdolillah have both my parents and I cant even imagine loosing them. But as Allah says that every Soul shall taste death hence I can only hope to have help from Allah.
Thx for your post. As your parents are with you, value them . Comfort them as much as you can. Nothing can be compared to the great feeling of heartfelt prayers of our parents. I am missing them so much.
Yes u can do qurbani for ur deceased relatives .... Hasmat Usmaani gave v good suggestions... but here I want to add that u can pray namaz as qaza for ur parents too... I'll try to find the reference as I read that in a book written by Imam Malik...
And if u know that ur Parents made a promise to someone or took money from some one or took responsbilty of any matter... u can fulfil it....
May Allah give them place in Jannat ul Firdaus and have mercy on them...ameen
I am really sorry to hear about your parents. Inna Lilla wainna illah e rajaioon. I know its very hard reality of life which almost everyone of us has to face one day - Thats why I always tell others to respect their parents and try to please them as much as possible.
To answer your question, I knew about few ahadiths which I googled to get the exact wordings for you and here are they :
It has been narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) said: “Whoever visits the graves of his parents or one of them every Friday, Allah shall forgive his sins and shall regard him to be of those who had been kind to his parents.”
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) has said: “One who performs Hajj on behalf of his parents and repays their debts shall be raised by Allah on the Day of Judgement amongst the righteous ones.”
**A man came to the Prophet and asked; “Oh! Messenger of Allah, now that my parents are dead, is there any act of dutifulness left for me to do towards them?” ** The Prophet answered; “Yes. There are four things; Supplication for them, praying that they are forgiven, fulfilment of their wills, being kind to their friends and maintaining good relations with those of your relatives with whom your kinship is established only through them.” (Related by Abu Dawood, Ibn Majah and others).
I am sure there are plenty of ahadiths and Ayats on parents subject but I need to look for it thoroughly. Do visit WiseMuslim that has got a lot of content on different topics discussed in the light of Islam.
What I have seen my at my house, like what my parents do for their deceased parents is, that my mom always say two nafals for her parents with every prayer. On their death anniversaries, we do Khairaath, give charity and do Quran khatam for them.
My Dad gave some money in construction of a mosque on behalf of his parents. So the sawab goes to them until the mosque is there and ppl go there for prayer.
My dad died in October last year. We do sadqa-e-jahriya for him and also read quran/tasbeeh like Hashmat Usmani said. FairyTale is right, you can also give a building donation towards a Masjid and the sawab will go to your parents. My dad gave it regularly in his life and we were told (by the Masjid people) that as long as the masjid is standing, he will get sawab for it.
We also visit his grave at least once a week.
I read a hadith that it is best to go on Thursday and Friday to the graveyard.
You can also put up a water pump. There is a hadith for this too ... put up a water pump as sadqa-e-jahriya for deceased persons. Hidaya Foundation (in America) offers this service specifically as sadqa-e-jahriya. It's about $200 plus taxes (and exchange rate fee). But if you know someone reliable in Pakistan/India/or whever you are from, they can also arrange to put it up in villages where they need water.
One of the most best things to read for the deceased person is plenty of kalimah shareef. In addition, you may recite the four 'Quls’, the fateha, Qur’an shareef, and everything else which carries reawrd, like the third kalimah, du’as etc, which you can then convey the reward for your parents. You can also try to make a khatam, every Thursdays, using this method.
Thanks guys for your great suggestions. I feel indebted to all of you especially FairyTale for quoting Ahadith. now I know what I have to do. Thx again
Thanks for your kind words. appreciate them. Are you sure we can do qurbani in their name?
**
yes mem saab...my bro does it for my dad n mom and grand parents from both sides. i do for some of them and change names every year. so, yes u can in at least Hanafii maslak.**
... but here I want to add that u can pray namaz as qaza for ur parents too... I'll try to find the reference as I read that in a book written by Imam Malik...
And if u know that ur Parents made a promise to someone or took money from some one or took responsbilty of any matter... u can fulfil it....
May Allah give them place in Jannat ul Firdaus and have mercy on them...ameen
**
sister, i believe u can NOT do qazaa prayers for a deceased loved one coz its famous phrase in urdu that after death ur ibaadaat come to a halt while ur good deeds [like sadaqa-e-jaariya (continual deeds)] continue to accumulate. plz find references coz i'll be very surprised.
yes sis, u can fulfill his/her obligations including marriages of ur sisters/brothers who haven't been married yet. Allah ham sab ko taufeeq 'ataa farmaaye k ham apne vaalidain ke nek aulaad baneN unkii zindagiyoN men bhii aur unke visaal ke ba'd bhii. shukria**
I read a hadith that it is best to go on Thursday and Friday to the graveyard.
**
there is no prophetic tradition to visit graves on a certain day. every visit counts. the idea behind visiting graves is two fold. one is to say du'a for teh deceased that will be sawaab to the dead and secondly its FOR YOU that you go there, sit down, ponder on ur own mortality and think how u can change ur life style to make it better for urself. visiting graves of ur loved ones is a good reminder taht u gonna come here one day...is shahr e Khamoshaan men aapko bhi ek din aanaa hai. iskii shahriyat leni hai isse koi mafar nai.
lets remember our own end and turn our lives around if there is a need. aameen**
namaaz paRho, isse pahle k tumhaarii namaaz [namaaz e janaaza] paRhii jaaye!
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yes mem saab...my bro does it for my dad n mom and grand parents from both sides. i do for some of them and change names every year. so, yes u can in at least Hanafii maslak.**
Thanks.
Yar, I am just a 'saab' not a 'mem saab' :).
- Thats why I always tell others to respect their parents and try to please them as much as possible.