Do you know how some people just like to discuss a topic, then debate it and debate it and debate it…and then you find you’re married to someone like that?
If you knew the guy was a debater type, would you marry him?
Re: Debate Relationships
I am like that and my husband is the complete opposite. I used to wish that he would debate with me. As smart as he is, he hates arguments and debates. Debating was encouraged in my family but not in his. I looked like a complete idiot when I tried to debate a topic and all I heard was crickets chirping in the dead silence. Embarrassing really. I have learned to hold my tongue over time. This can happen to anyone if the spouse doesn't like to argue or debate. It's amazing what a few years of living with someone can do. You can completely change or you can change someone. Basically, both find a way to coexist happily.
Re: Debate Relationships
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As smart as he is, he hates arguments and debates.
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Obviously he is wise too. :)
Re: Debate Relationships
I hate it when ppl beat that topic to death unless they hear the words yes ur right. I had a friend like that who could never end it on let's agree to disagree (that was my stance). Nooooo she would go on and on and on (multiple ppl conversation, not just me and her necessarily), and finally to get her to shut up I would say something along the lines yes what ur saying also might be possible (on some alternate universe, and in another dimension :) ) and that is the only way she'd shut up. And the rest of the ppl in the group used to look at me with "thankful" eyes k shukar hae uski nonsense khatum hui.
Its always good to hear alternate points of view but not if every conversation is going to turn to a persuasive speech that u can't get out of. And if that guy is that kind of "debater" then Id like to run in the other direction. Jo Banda har kisi k saath seengh phasata hae (and can't accept others arguments), ppl are usually wary of such ppl and then tend to edge away if they see another oncoming drama.
Re: Debate Relationships
no. My dad is like that and it drives my mom nuts. He makes issue out of simple things and go on and on about it till death
Re: Debate Relationships
i think discussions and a dose of debating is pretty good. obviously not debating something to death or arguing about it but being able to talk about various topics and sharing dis/agreements can be fun.
Re: Debate Relationships
Are you interested in someone ( ;) )
Re: Debate Relationships
I am like that and my husband is the complete opposite. I used to wish that he would debate with me. As smart as he is, he hates arguments and debates. Debating was encouraged in my family but not in his. I looked like a complete idiot when I tried to debate a topic and all I heard was crickets chirping in the dead silence. Embarrassing really. I have learned to hold my tongue over time. This can happen to anyone if the spouse doesn't like to argue or debate. It's amazing what a few years of living with someone can do. You can completely change or you can change someone. Basically, both find a way to coexist happily.
Exactly the same with me. I used to thrive on debates - whereas his family are taught to 'stay quiet and listen to elders'. I love religious debates too, and used to try and talk to his father about things. But rather than encourage debate, it was viewed as me being rude :( so I stopped. And that was the end of that.