Certainly one of the worst things that can happen to anyone.
Unfortunately, a very dear friend's some 2 weeks old boy passed away. Needless to say he was devastated, and after talking to him so was I. Bad timing I would say, when I called him he was on his way to bury the child, his brother handed him the phone and he just cried, I couldn't sleep for 2 damn nights.
The people I have spoken with, they say a newborn child taken away is relatively less hurtful than death of someone who you have spent more time with, because it takes time to develop that bond. Perhaps easier said than done?
I pray none of us has to go through that pain, but if you have experienced such a loss in your life or someone close to you has gone through it - how do you cope with it? Do you ever sort of get over (although this may not be the right word) this? Perhaps it is easier when you are blessed with more children? Do you ever sort of get back to your normal self again?
And how do you convey your condolences when you can't even be there for them? I feel like a wuss for not being able to gather up enough courage to speak with him on the phone - it would have been a lot different if I could be by their side if you know what I mean.
PS - My apologies if it sounds like a collection of random thoughts, but it is all over my head right now.
The same thing happened to my best friend. She knew the baby wasn't well before hand and was told by docs to abort (we're in the UK) but she refused and her little girl lived for 5 hours before dying.
They were absolutely devastated, I saw her husband just drop to the floor and cry with such raw pain. I will never forget that time.
All I could do with them was talk about the time they had with her. What was she like? They found this easier than the questions about what was wrong. They were smiling talking about her.
I'm not saying this is the right thing for your friend, but sometimes these things aren't mentioned by anyone else. And it can be helpul to the couple who need to have her thoughts steered away from the negatives.
They will stop hurting soon.. My friend is expecting again after already having a little boy a year ago too. The new child can never replace the one that dies, and they still speak of her regularly. It just hurts less as time goes on.