Reha
February 15, 2012, 6:28pm
16
Re: Dealing with this issue…
My cousin Arif has been in a process of getting a divorce from Shami. It has been one year since their separation and court trial. They wanted to take out as much money as they could from my cousin’s bank account according to U.S law. My cousin’s dad provided Shami’s family with green cards under his business and moved the entire family to U.S. They lived 5 minutes away from Shami’s so she would stay at her parent’s house more than staying with her husband. Shami wanted Arif to pay her $4,000 every month for expenses and pocket money. They argued about it for over a year that he cant afford to pay her that much. The family allowed her 2 years to be responsible and take role in house chores but Shami never did any work since servants are available in Pakistan. After 2 years, the husband started telling her to take interest in house responsibilities. She never made breakfast for her husband neither participated serving her mother-in-law. The marriage ended due to irreconcilable differences between Shami and Arif.
Arif’s family has been trying to keep the divorce at low level in the community. On the other hand, Shami’s family has been spreading rumors to bring Arif’s family reputation down that Arif’s mom did zulm on my daughter. In reality, the mom has been very sweet to her and never pushed her to do any work. The daughter never served her food. Reality is that the wife was not happy about living in a joint family system but my cousin wanted to live with his old mother. He thought she was his responsibility. My cousin loved her a lot but she never appreciated his love. How am I supposed to deal with them spreading rumors about the family and lying about the mom who is very islamic? Why does the girl get sympathy? The girl was very greedy and she always bugged my cousin about everything… I dont feel comfortable about sharing this with people but should I start telling people about their family’s real face? Badnaami kyu ker rahay hai apni beti ki na-qamiyabi per?
Everyone tried to save the relation but Shami’s family ruined the daughter’s life by controlling her. Arif made a statement that Shami never told her that she loves him in 4 years of marriage. She would be with him but have thoughts of her mom in mind. She was never a responsible wife who never cooked or clean, when told by her husband to clean then she felt that he was doing zulm on her. Arif tried very hard with love to make her understand but she never listened. Shami wanted to get paid every month to sit in her room whole day long and have the title of being his wife.
What do the the girl’s family get with false statement sympathy?
See below
i don’t know but it sounds a little suspicious to me when either the guy or the gal can do no wrong…
I can anticipate that there is usually one person in the relationship that may take a greater amount of blame but highly unlikely that either is totally blameless as is portrayed here.
To the OP:
I’m not saying you’re wrong or right. What I am saying is that it sounds weird…highly unlikely that all this happened and ONLY the girl was to blame here. I am pretty sure there’s more to this story.