I know that it rewarding and jannat winning if one brings up his daughters nicely and gets them married… please state some ahadis, quranic material, anything so that i can tell my MIL and sis in law that girls are not a burden and something of no value. Thnx, may Allah be with u all amin.
The Excellence of bringing up Girls
By Yoosuf ibn 'Abdullaah Al-'Areefee
The encouragement to seek children covers both sons and daughters, and along with this general encouragement Islam has given special merits to seeking and bringing up girls - contrary to the thinking of the people of ignorance (age of ‘Jaahiliyyah’) of the past and present, since the people of ignorance - wherever and whenever found - hated (some of them ‘still do’) to have daughters and were grieved and angered by their births!
“And when the news of (the birth of) a female (child) is brought to any of them, his face becomes dark, and he is filled with inward grief! He hides himself from the people because of the evil of that whereof he has been informed. Shall he keep her with dishonor or bury her in the earth? Certainly, evil is their decision.” (An-Nahl 16:58-59)
But the Messenger of Islam, Muhammad(saw), came elevating the status of this gift given by Allah(swt), welcoming the daughters, and raising high the importance of their upbringing with words to delight the hearts of the believing fathers and bring joy to their souls:
“Whoever takes care of two girls until they reach adulthood - he and I will come (together) on the Day of Resurrection - and he interlaced his fingers (meaning in Paradise).” (Reported by Muslim)
So can there be any greater honor given to daughter!? And for those who wish to have them and bring them up properly!? And he said in another Hadith:
“Whoever has three daughters or sisters, or two daughters of two sisters, and lives along with them in a good manner, and has patience with them, and fears Allah with regard to them will enter Paradise.” (Reported by Abu Dawud, Al-Tirmidhee and others)
And in another Hadith:
“They will be a shield for him from the Fire.” (Reported by Ahmad and Ibn Maajah) And along with the Messenger’s(saw) honoring the daughters with his words, we find that he also gave us a living example in his own actions and behavior - for example,
“One day he(saw) led his Companions in Prayer whilst carrying Umaamah bint Zaynab(ra) when he made rukoo’ he would put her down, then when he stood, he would pick her up.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
So the position of daughters in Islam is very clear and the encouragement that it gives for them, and also the hatred it has for those who hate them or are grieved at their births! We know from this that hatred in some souls toward something - if found - is not a true judgement upon that thing and this is explained in the Qurân, as Allah(swt) says:
“…If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings through it a great deal of good.” (An-Nisa’ 4:19)
So how many righteous women have brought happiness and well-being upon their families and their Ummah!? And how many corrupt young men have brought every form of misfortune and trial upon this Ummah!?
Therefore, it is upon the parents who have intellect to accept whatever Allah’s(swt) gift is with full joy and happiness, whether the gift is male or a female. Since its being a male or being a female is due only to Allah’s(swt) order alone - He, the One free from all imperfections - and Most High says:
“To Allah belongs the kingdom of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills. He bestows female (offspring) upon whom He wills, and bestows male (offspring) upon whom He wills. Or He bestows both males and females, and He renders barren who He wills. Verily, He is the All-Knower and is Able to do all things.” (Ash-Shura 42:49-50)
And finally, a stern warning of the ‘Day of Judgment’ is given to all those people who went (still go) to the extremes of killing their (infant) daughters (or these days knowingly go for an abortion after finding out the gender of the fetus) out of fear of poverty or shying away from responsibility, superstitions or ignorant customs etc;
When the sun (with its spacious light) is folded up; When the stars fall, losing their lustre; When the mountains vanish (like a mirage); When the she-camels, ten months with young, are left untended; When the wild beasts are herded together (in the human habitations); When the oceans boil over with a swell; When the souls are sorted out, (being joined, like with like); When the female (infant), buried alive, is questioned - For what crime she was killed; When the scrolls are laid open; When the world on High is unveiled; When the Blazing Fire is kindled to fierce heat; And when the Garden is brought near; (Then) shall each soul know what it has put forward."
(Qur’an 81:1-14)
The Value of Daughters in Islam
There are many hadeeths (sayings of Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him) which tell of the value of daughters in Islam. Here are some of them:
- “If someone has three daughters and is patient with them and clothes them from his wealth, they will be a shield against the Fire for him.”
- “There is no Muslim who has two daughters and takes good care of them but that he will enter the Garden.”
- “Anyone who has three daughters and provides for them, clothes them and shows mercy to them will definitely enter the Garden.” A man from the people said, “And two daughters, Messenger of Allah?” He said, “And two.”
- “No one has three daughters or three sisters and is good to them but that he will enter the Garden.”
- “Shall I show you the greatest sadaqa (or one of the greatest forms of sadaqa)?” He replied, “Yes, indeed, Messenger of Allah!” He went on, “To provide for your daughter when she is returned to you and you are her sole source of provision.”
All of these sayings are authentic and have been collected by the great scholar, Imam al-Bukhari, in his book Al-Adab Al-Mufrad. Contrary to popular belief, Islam does not lessen the status of women - mothers, wives, or daughters. They are - in fact - of great value, as we learn from Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him.
Islamic teachings brought something good which asked people of that age to stop having wrong and illogical concepts of having a girl born in a family.
It essentialy abolished the negative feelings of having a girl and rightly so.
What a great thing of having children, boy or girl.:)
Islamic teachings brought something good which asked people of that age to stop having wrong and illogical concepts of having a girl born in a family.
It essentialy abolished the negative feelings of having a girl and rightly so.
What a great thing of having children, boy or girl.:)
It also abolished the killing of ones daughter and seeing them as a burden which is still a big problem in hinduism!
Re: Daughters in Islam
hi boredom, these are some excellent insights for your in-laws ^ what I find sad is that both your mother-in-law and sis-in-law, being women themselves, would need proof of a girl’s worth and call them a burden otherwise 
these women have such a low opinion about themselves, is that how they think of themselves, worthless and a burden? Your daughters are lucky to have a mother like you, looking out for them and sheltering them from this jahalat 
Re: Daughters in Islam
boredom, sometimes cultural influences are so great that no matter what, many of our people still prefer the male child. It's like a feeling of superiority and power.
Just pray for such people because no logic will make any sense.
I know that it rewarding and jannat winning if one brings up his daughters nicely and gets them married... please state some ahadis, quranic material, anything so that i can tell my MIL and sis in law that girls are not a burden and something of no value. Thnx, may Allah be with u all amin.
Girls are not Zehmat ( burden ) They are rehmat on Parents from ALLAH ( Son is naymat and daughter is Rehmat for parents) ... Its heared so often in Islamic lecture, debates and majalis that i didnt actually think abt the source... I am sure it will be really easy to find the source, if u cant plz let me know i will try to look for it.
Now what is rehmat ? the best spirtual defination i can think of is "Prophet Mohammed s.a.w is rehmat-ul-lil-alameen." Which means He is rehmat for everyone. keeping that in mind if you think about our daughters being rehmat for us too, u will know what is importance of daughter in Islam.
Wasalam
Aqeel.
Re: Daughters in Islam
Ask your Saas & Naanand, did their parents see them as burden and not of value as well?
Re: Daughters in Islam
The Excellence of Raising Daughters
By Yoosuf ibn 'Abdullaah Al-'Areefee
The encouragement to seek children covers both sons and daughters, and along with this general encouragement Islam has given special merits to seeking and bringing up girls - contrary to the thinking of the people of ignorance (age of ‘Jaahiliyyah’) of the past and present, since the people of ignorance - wherever and whenever found - hated (some of them ‘still do’) to have daughters and were grieved and angered by their births!
“And when the news of (the birth of) a female (child) is brought to any of them, his face becomes dark, and he is filled with inward grief! He hides himself from the people because of the evil of that whereof he has been informed. Shall he keep her with dishonor or bury her in the earth? Certainly, evil is their decision.” (An-Nahl 16:58-59)
But the Messenger of Islam, Muhammad(saw), came elevating the status of this gift given by Allah(swt), welcoming the daughters, and raising high the importance of their upbringing with words to delight the hearts of the believing fathers and bring joy to their souls:
“Whoever takes care of two girls until they reach adulthood - he and I will come (together) on the Day of Resurrection - and he interlaced his fingers (meaning in Paradise).” (Reported by Muslim)
So can there be any greater honor given to daughter and for those who wish to have them and bring them up properly? And he said in another Hadith:
“Whoever has three daughters or sisters, or two daughters of two sisters, and lives along with them in a good manner, and has patience with them, and fears Allah with regard to them will enter Paradise.” (Reported by Abu Dawud, Al-Tirmidhee and others)
And in another Hadith: “They will be a shield for him from the Fire.” (Reported by Ahmad and Ibn Maajah)
And along with the Messenger’s(saw) honoring the daughters with his words, we find that he also gave us a living example in his own actions and behavior - for example,
“One day he (s.a.w) led his Companions in Prayer whilst carrying Umaamah bint Zaynab(ra) when he made rukoo’ he would put her down, then when he stood, he would pick her up.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
So the position of daughters in Islam is very clear and the encouragement that it gives for them, and also the hatred it has for those who hate them or are grieved at their births! We know from this that hatred in some souls toward something - if found - is not a true judgement upon that thing and this is explained in the Qurân, as Allah(swt) says:
“…If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings through it a great deal of good.” (An-Nisa’ 4:19)
So how many righteous women have brought happiness and well-being upon their families and their Ummah!? And how many corrupt young men have brought every form of misfortune and trial upon this Ummah!?
Therefore, it is upon the parents who have intellect to accept whatever Allah’s(swt) gift is with full joy and happiness, whether the gift is male or a female. Since its being a male or being a female is due only to Allah’s(swt) order alone - He, the One free from all imperfections - and Most High says:
“To Allah belongs the kingdom of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills. He bestows female (offspring) upon whom He wills, and bestows male (offspring) upon whom He wills. Or He bestows both males and females, and He renders barren who He wills. Verily, He is the All-Knower and is Able to do all things.” (Ash-Shura 42:49-50)