"Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

Lifestyle Relationships
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Salaam

Ok im getting married InshAllah in December.

And im getting advices from everyone “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

What does it mean dabke mat rehna mean? And how do you know when to draw your line? Ie when to compromise and when to just listen to him!

This is sooo confusing and its been eating my brain for the past couple of days!

Any thoughts? experiences?

Thanks

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

Well when he asks you to murder somebody you say no but when he asks for you to make a sandwich you say yes..

(I'm half joking btw)

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Re: “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

Stay on top . . . literally :chai:

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

in my understanding when ppl say this is urdu, it means dont let him control you, or be your own in the marriage and to speak up if you want too. lol i find this funny marriage advice

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Re: “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

urgh what’s wrong with gs today? can’t you guys talk about nice things?

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband


to a one-liner question, here is a one-liner answer...it means in simple and plain language:

suno sab kii, karo apnii marzii kii!
[listen to all, do what you desire!] :)

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

I think it could probably be worded better. Maybe what they mean is not let him disrespect you.

At the end of the day, all these ladies do not know your husband. Only you do. You have to judge for yourself and see where you need to draw the line...or if you even need to draw one. You might never need to.

Listen to everything but only do what is right for you and your marriage.

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

thanks this is helpful! I swear I have nooo clue! Yeh hopefully i never have to!

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Re: “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

Pretty similar to this thread here.

http://www.paklinks.com/gs/life-and-relationships/557807-husband-or-slave.html

What’s with people and dishing out crappy advice?

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

Thats really strange you getting advises on how you have to daaba ke rakhna ur husband...I was advised all the time before getting married to be kind to your husband try to keep him happy so that he keeps you happy...You shouldnt be taking those kind of advises sounds really illiterate!...start a your married life with a good positive thinking rather then this stupid kinda thoughts!

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Re: “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

For most of the advise giver “aunties” dub k mut rehna means k make issue out of everything and do not listen to huband. Alwahs oppose him because if you listened to him once, you have to listen to him always.

for me dub k mut rehna means do not toe the line of husband blindly. If you have opinion on any issue and your think that its informed opinion and good for both of you, you should convey that nicely to your husband and at the same time listen to his opinion too.

:chai:

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

Wazan 100kg se upar kar lo. Dabnay ka sawal hi nahi.

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

does the same hold true for "all these ladies" of GS too?? :p

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

Abeek, all the best for your marriage!

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

ALthough it means that dont let him hukum chalaa'o on you, but what they are actually telling you ke shohar ko apnee jooti ke neeche rakhnaa.

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Re: “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

I am trying to understand what’s not so nice about the above. Conversely, it relays the meaning that not staying on top . . . literally is otherwise a nice thing :chai:

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Re: “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

:hmmm: after reading the comments “listen to everyone or him and do watever u want”

THIS phenomenon RARELY happens especially in asian weddings… i have seen the most hyped out females, nak charis and all and at the end of the day full time husband kay neechay lagi hoti haen…

u call em up for get tohether and they r like “mera khaawand to meray saamnay bolta tak nahi, jo bhi mein kahoun g g zaroor zaroor kerta hai” and YES in the middle of the conversation when the hubby calls “the wife” would literally stand up in the middle of 10-15 females and say “haan g, g, g, g sun rahi houn mein, g g aa jaoun gi juldi, g ap nay keh deeya na and at the end g Allah hafiz”

come on ppl give some REALITY check advice to the girl… not the books thingy :chai:

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

Well its not wrestling match, its your life so be wise i think its not a good suggestion ky Dhab ky maat rehanaa :(

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Re: “Dabke mat rehna” with your husband

exactly mrray at least kisi nay to ye bola hai :naraz:

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Re: "Dabke mat rehna" with your husband

i dont think its a good idea to start thinking like this .. i wouldnt take this advice ..