This thread is inspired by a thread in life1 regarding age differences between potential prospects.
What is the view on age differences in marriage in the different culture? Is an age difference preferred or is it preferred that potential spouses be around the same age? What have you observed?
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
as long as women are dependent on men in our culture, they have to be younger than their husbands to stay "suhaagan" [married and taken care of]. also, women age faster than men so it's only fair to have a younger wife so that they don't look odd couples...the age difference mustn't be too much [in excess of 5 years] that they look like father and daughter! :D i would say 5 year difference is ideal, that is man 5 years older than the woman.
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
It differs really - in Canada where I live, I've noticed even in desi guys that they want someone closer to their age.. even my brother preferred only 1 year max of an age difference. Unless it's an arranged marriage - what I've noticed is that's the trend.
Personally speaking... My husband is only a few months older than me and we relate to one another and in terms of how we look and who looks older - we both look around the same age and before when he was a little chubbier - he actually looked a bit older than me. So I think in terms of looks and who looks older - has more to do with your genes, how well you age and also how well you take care of yourself. I've seen men who look 5+ years older than they are because they have not aged well or have not taken care of themselves at all.
I think in arranged marriages - age difference and this belief that women age faster, tend to look older, etc is still upheld but in terms of love marriages - I've noticed its the opposite. It's more common for people to look for someone who is closer to age or the same age.
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
It differs really - in Canada where I live, I've noticed even in desi guys that they want someone closer to their age.. even my brother preferred only 1 year max of an age difference. Unless it's an arranged marriage - what I've noticed is that's the trend.
Personally speaking... My husband is only a few months older than me and we relate to one another and in terms of how we look and who looks older - we both look around the same age and before when he was a little chubbier - he actually looked a bit older than me. So I think in terms of looks and who looks older - has more to do with your genes, how well you age and also how well you take care of yourself. I've seen men who look 5+ years older than they are because they have not aged well or have not taken care of themselves at all.
I think in arranged marriages - age difference and this belief that women age faster, tend to look older, etc is still upheld but in terms of love marriages - I've noticed its the opposite. It's more common for people to look for someone who is closer to age or the same age.
oh i see...my to be wife is 5 years younger than me which is what i always desired.
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
In Arab culture, there used to be a formula for bride's age : Groom's age / 2 + 9
I think this formula sounds good if groom's age is considered not below 18, though, marrying elder ladies was not a taboo in Arab society even before Islam.
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
Back home in Pakistan, I see that a girl's age can potentially become a deal breaker, no matter how good or qualified she is , but when it comes to men, it is seen as if age doesnt matter. I dont know why there is such a huge difference of opinion on this matter or why even this is given this great an importance.
If two people seem compatible , does it really matter who is how many years older or younger then the other?
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
Unfortunately true. Girls above certain age are considered like expired products in society and such dil dukhane wale comments normally comes from ladies or gents under influence of ladies.
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
I think it depends on the role a husband and wife have with each other.
If it's a traditional subordinate wife role then an age difference is probably preferred. I guess they're considered easier to control or something though it's usually the opposite.
None of my male cousins wanted a young wife. In their late 20s they didn't want to get married even to a 22 year old even though that market was wide open for them. Their priority was a companion whom they could relate to and talk to and not someone they had to chide and control.
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
This thread is inspired by a thread in life1 regarding age differences between potential prospects.
What is the view on age differences in marriage in the different culture? Is an age difference preferred or is it preferred that potential spouses be around the same age? What have you observed?
Watta Satta or Exchange Marraiges... Those marriages may ignore age difference. Same age marriages are now acceptable in society but not popular. Most marriages in Pakistan... girl suppose to younger than guy.....
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
i think +/- 5 years is suggested with guy being older.
I don't think there is any rule set in concrete though i guess with conservative cultures guys are expected to be older. I think it's because guys who are older are thought to be more mature and responsible.
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
oh i see...my to be wife is 5 years younger than me which is what i always desired.
That's great , congrats :)
Re: Cultural Views on Age Differences in Marriage
Interesting article.
Can an older woman marry a younger man in Pakistan? – The Express Tribune Blog