cousin's wife

You know when I first read this, this exact thought was in my head. That is a possibility, that it is not your cousin in law's fault, especially because she did not ask you for the contact information.

Regardless, if you don't like replying to her e-mails or facebook message you can always give her the "busy-busy" signal. But if you do that, just occasionally call her up, to see how's she's doing, just so she knows you and her are in good terms. I think this sitation is a temporary problem- after a while this will all pass when she gets going with her own life and starts to feel comfortable with her new family- so be as nice as possible.