Ok guppies and guppans, I have a serious point of discussion.
What are your honest opinions on having more than one couples Baraat/Valima on the same day. For example, 2 brothers/2 sisters/ brother and sister having wedding functions together?
Also, what about 2+ couples of the same family?
I have in theory, heard of this being done (3 brothers all had valima together, and 2 of the brides were sisters so had baraat day together too), but in my mind it sounds like a recipe for disaster!
Would you say it is disrespectful/ rude/ unnecessary to refuse this set-up?
I’ve seen that happen. I’ve seen two sisters getting married on the same day, a brothers valima and a sisters barat on the same day, two siblings mehndis done together. And all of them turned out fantastic!! It just depends how you arrange and decide for everything. What needs to be done first and how it will be done.
If the issue is money, or lack of it, than I understand how sharing your wedding day makes sense.
Personally, if money was an issue, I'd rather have a tiny reception at home than share my wedding day with anyone.
I had a friend at uni, who used to swear she would never agree to have a shared wedding with any of her sisters. Because she said 'ke agar ikathay shadi ho tou log bara zaleel karte hain, ke yeh dulhan zyada pyari hai...uss ka jora zyada acha hai...uska dulha zyada pyara hai" etc. So in short, she hated the idea of a 'joint wedding' because of the comparisons that people would do.
Also some superstitious people believe that if two or more couples get married on the same day, one of them will always have a troubled marriage. Of course that's the most non nonsensical thing ever. Unless the couples are constantly comparing themselves and their married life to each others, I don't see why one of them has to be 'jinxed'.
^ many desi aunties have told me the same too. that if two girls get married on the same day, one of their husband passes away earlier or there wil be problems in their marriage.
i too wouldnt like such a wedding, not because of the abv reason but because it is MY day and i dont want ppl comparing which bride is better looking, who has preetier clothes etc.
As long as both the couples (especially the brides) are truly ok with this...WITHOUT being pressured to say "yes" from others......then there is nothing wrong with it.
I think it’s a good idea. In addition to saving the cost, it also saves a lot of hassle. We did it that way (joint reception) and it worked out very well,
I mean if two couples willingly agree, sure. Have at it.
But, shadi sirf aik duffa hoti hai (hopefully). I wouldn't want to share my husband or my spotlight with another couple. Call it selfish, but many girls dream about their wedding for yearsssss!!! I doubt many of their dreams include another couple on stage with them.
I have seen multi-couple weddings. How they're planned, arranged, and managed makes a world of a difference. As long as both, or all, couples are on the same page, everything goes smoothly. But if one couple plans something and the other couple is left to sit and watch... kinda kills the night for them and their guests.
Sharing with sibs... I dono man. I imagine little things could cause a rift between sibs. Esp if there's a bridezilla with in the bunch. LOL.
Just my personal opinions, based on what I've seen.
I dont' see how its a win win when people will most likely be comparing each bride/couple. Yes, that happens.
People who do that, will do it anyway even if the functions are 2..3..4 days apart. We have to stop living for "people" and see whats convenient for us
^ I agree with that point, but I still think it's kind of cruel to have 2 brides in one function if neither is okay with it. Yes, it's not practical or cost-saving, but life always isn't about being practical/saving costs....
^ I agree with that point, but I still think it's kind of cruel to have 2 brides in one function if neither is okay with it. Yes, it's not practical or cost-saving, but life always isn't about being practical/saving costs....
of course. I was not saying that do it even if brides and/or grooms are not okay with it but if they are on board, its a great way to do it specially here in US/Canada where many of the guests drive from different states and its not easy for everyone to take 2..3..4 days vacation
I mean if two couples willingly agree, sure. Have at it.
But, shadi sirf aik duffa hoti hai (hopefully). I wouldn't want to share my husband or my spotlight with another couple. Call it selfish, but many girls dream about their wedding for yearsssss!!! I doubt many of their dreams include another couple on stage with them.
I have seen multi-couple weddings. How they're planned, arranged, and managed makes a world of a difference. As long as both, or all, couples are on the same page, everything goes smoothly. But if one couple plans something and the other couple is left to sit and watch... kinda kills the night for them and their guests.
Sharing with sibs... I dono man. I imagine little things could cause a rift between sibs. Esp if there's a bridezilla with in the bunch. LOL.
Just my personal opinions, based on what I've seen.
I never saw it that way. Then again, I guess all of us just wanted to do it as efficiently as possible. Another thing that really helped was that we decided to keep it really simple. So we just rented the main hall, an extra hall for prayers, table cloth and some dishes. Nobody was bothered about having any type of fancy decorations or anything like that. So it was a win-win situation. We pulled off everything in less than 1/10 of what I've heard others have spent on wedding related functions. When you consider that the function for both couples was done like this, then it's an even better deal.
Everyone has made interesting points, especially around the financial and logistics of travelling side.
The superstitious aspect is not in line with Islamic teachings, however I have found that for some it is a major detriment, so if it is going to make you uncomfortable in the slightest, is it best to just avoid?
How exactly do they share the stage? I mean it is always crowded with one bride and groom!
How would be a polite way to decline? and is it being unreasonable to feel that way?
